Friday, March 11, 2011

A Fistful of Unwelcomed Visitors! (Brad's Picks)


With the release of Battle: LA today, we here at ITMOD thought it would be nice to bring you a Top Five consisting of the worst Pain-In-The-Ass Visitors to ever pester the human race.  

5.  The Crites (Critters 1 - 4):  These nasty little space hedgehogs munched and tortured humans over the course of four films, but their nastiest bit of home invasion was definitely their original visitation upon the poor Brown Homestead.  Fugitives on the run from the Bounty Hunter Ug, The Crites feast on the family cows, chickens, goldfish, and Billy Zane!  Thank goodness for the town drunk, Charlie, without whom Earth might have been completely digested.  



4.  Officer Pete Davis (Unlawful Entry):  Kurt Russell and Madeline Stowe think they've met quite a friend in Ray Liotta's patrolman Davis.  He has such a nice smile.  But he just keeps popping by the home.  He sneaks a peek.  He likes what he sees.  He wants what Russell's got.  In the end there is only Liotta's rage and his Single White Female crazy.  And lots of Liotta creepy leering.


3.  Pazuzu (The Exorcist):  The King of Demons invades the body of pretty little Regan and tells priests what their mothers do in hell...not nice.




2.  Hans Gruber & Friends (Die Hard):  80s Yuppies have their Christmas Party interrupted by the greatest group of squib-popping terrorists ever assembled.  Seriously, all cinematic villains must be compared with Hans Gruber.  He's highly educated, well-dressed, confident, and seriously cold blooded.   



1.  The Rat (Of Unknown Origin):  Poor, poor Peter Weller.  He's got a great job with a promotion ahead.  He's living in a swanky New York brownstone.  And he's married to Playmate of the Year Shannon Tweed. But when wife & son head off for vacation Weller is left to fend for himself against a vicious, metaphorically monstrous NYC rat.  Man vs. Beast!!!!  Leviathan's got nothing on The Rat.  It'll lead ya to drink and devastation.  


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