Dork Hero: Peter Cushing

Like many of my generation I first became aware of Peter Cushing late in his life, as Grand Moff Tarkin, the real villain of the first Star Wars film (Vader was just a lapdog for Tarkin).  But I quickly saw him in several other films, and realized that he was quite the cool old dude.  As I transitioned into my teen years, he was my gateway drug, getting me hooked on the world of Hammer Horror.  I remain a junkie for bodice ripping, Gothic tinted, British horror/weird films.  Today is the 101st anniversary of his birth.  A tip of the hat to one of the great gentlemen of film.

Five Favorite Peter Cushing Movies:
5.  Star Wars
4.  At the Earth's Core
3. The Curse of Frankenstein
2.  Twins of Evil
1.  She (1965)

-Matt

Rick Baker's Frankenstein

io9 has a short writeup on Rick Baker's M.A.C. Cosmetics unveiling of his Steampunk Frankenstein.  It's a gorgeous piece from the master of makeup applications, but it also fills me with a gloomy sadness that such art is relegated to Cosplay these days.  When was the last time you saw such a beautiful horror on screen instead of some uncanny CG creation?  You don't need me to blather on about the unreality of the digital concoction - I'm not even sure that's true anymore as the next generation of film fanatics is bred on such sights they're Suspension of Disbelief has adjusted.  Us old folks are left dreaming of the practical delights of yesteryear.  Oh well.  This Steampunk Frankenstein is badass.

--Brad

Matt’s Week in Dork! (10/13/13-10/19/13)

    Got an early, early start to this Week in Dork with a trip to see Gravity.  Glad that movie is doing well, because that’s the kind of science fiction we should be seeing more of, even if it wasn’t great.

Gravity:  Sadly, this is one of the better films to come out of 2013.  It’s a fair science fiction adventure, if not amazing.  Lots of long takes and some beautiful imagery, along with pretty good performances make it watchable.  However, there are a few annoying little quibbles that stuck in my craw, particularly the forced religiosity.  And though Bullock does a pretty good job, and looks the part, her character is simply not that interesting, and her back-story is lame.  But all in all, it’s not bad.  And I really love the last couple of minutes, even if they were detached from the rest of the film.  The imagery and music work very well together, creating a shot that I’ve seen in my head many times, but that I don’t think I’ve ever seen in a film ‘til now.

    On Sunday night, I watched some more Space 1999.  That show has some excellent episodes, some really creepy stories.  One where they found a parallel Earth that still had it’s moon, and a woman died from having an extra brain appear in her head…that was just weird, man.

Brigadoon:  “You don’t have to explain anything to me.  I don’t care.”  I just could not get into this one at all.  It’s basically Lost Horizon, but annoying, with no interesting characters and lots of singing.  None of the songs are particularly memorable.  And the fantasy element makes little sense.  Everyone in Brigadoon acts as thought they’ve lived hundreds of years, but for them, it’s only been two days.  What gives?  This modern fairy tale could absolutely have worked (as it has several times in several other films), but not here.  Maybe this works better on stage.  On film, it’s not that good.

The Expendables 2:  A bunch of meatheads spout semi-literate one-liners at each other while everything (including wave after wave of Eastern European fodder) explodes.  This is the obvious descendant of all those muscle bound action movies of the 80s, and not just because it stars all kinds of the retirees of that golden age of stupid.  It doesn’t come a lot more low brown and silly than this, but it’s a heck of a lot more fun than a dozen more serious films.  You have to go in to these films with a certain mindset.  If you’re looking for good dialog that isn’t awkwardly delivered, and a complex plot, well, look somewhere else.

Wings:  Sadly, it doesn’t take much to achieve this status, but Wings is one of the best World War I films I’ve seen.  Amazing air combat sequences, brutal trench fighting, some pretty good actors, and a solid, if not amazing story.  It’s got plenty of heroics, but also does get into some of the grit and grime of war.  Some of the violence is disturbing, even to this jaded modern viewer.  When the camera holds on a pilot as he’s shot to death and his plane plunges to the ground, it’s quite gruesome and effective.

Godzilla VS SpaceGodzilla:  I’m not gonna lie.  This era (90s) of Godzilla kind of sucks.  The stories aren’t good, the effects look cheap, and they’re just sort of goofy.  And that’s without adding Godzilla’s kid (which, sadly, this film does).  I like some of the SpaceGodzilla stuff, like his weird use of crystals.  I wish there had been better stuff with the humans, that maybe would have involved trying to figure out what that was all about, and how they might do something about it to help Godzilla.  Frankly, the film felt slapped together.

Frankenstein’s Army:  I don’t generally like found footage films and this movie doesn‘t change my mind.  The story is fun, and the characters OK for this kind of film.  But the film looks too new, too modern.  Even the tricks and effects to make it seem ‘primitive’ look too slick and polished.  That said, it feels like watching someone play a really good video game, like Bioshock or something.  There’s an almost rollercoaster aspect to parts near the end, that were making me laugh (with, not at) out loud.  The retro-tech is very cool.  And it has moments that really shine.  I’d rather the film been more traditional, with steady-cam and tripod, told completely (or even mostly) in the third person.  But I enjoyed the content of the film enough to overcome the technique.  Worth checking out for those who enjoy very weird, genre-mixing horror.  Russians, Nazis, and Frankenstein’s monsters.  OK.  Why not.

Lifeforce:  “Well, here I go.”  Every time I watch this film, I like it a little more.  The sprawling story, the cast of characters, the actors, the weird effects, the crazy plot progression…and Mathilda May.  I can’t overstate how much Mathilda May does for the film.  But beyond a stunningly beautiful woman walking around naked, there’s a pretty weird and cool Lovecraftian tale of alien energy vampires, plague, and mass hysteria.  Not to everyone’s taste, to be sure, horror fans, sci-fi fans, and especially fans of the old Hammer sci-fi horror films (like the Quatermass series) need to see it.

Machete Kills:  “Machete loves everyone.”  Where does one start?  Well, I’ll start with the good.  1) Danny Trejo was really good.  That is all.  The bad…everything else.  The dialog is bad, until the women start talking.  Then the dialog is offensively bad.  The story wanders around so much that at around the halfway point, I couldn’t believe the movie wasn’t over yet.  It fails on epic levels.  For a pseudo-grindhouse movie, it lacks all the things that make a grindhouse film, except for shoddy technical production.  Bad, bad, bad CGI used instead of even the most rudimentary (and effective) practical effects (fake blood isn’t even expensive; catsup would have looked better).  Where’s the nudity?  Not here, that’s for sure.  The very beginning is so bugnuts that it got my hopes up.  The rest of the movie soundly destroyed my hopes, then peed all over their remains.  If you enjoyed the first film, skip this one.  If you enjoy things that suck and are really boring, check it out.  So much potential for something good.  So must disappointment.

Wish it was more like this.

    I finished reading Sean Faircloth’s book Attack of the Theocrats.  It’s at once infuriating and energizing.  Seeing just how religious factions in this country have done more to erode human rights, scientific literacy, and the Constitution is disturbing.

Black Widow:  Kind of an incorrectly titled film, the movie is not at all about a black widow, but about a straight-shooting guy who gets the legal bum’s rush from an aspiring writer.  When the young woman writer shows up dead in his apartment, things get dicey fast.  The nasty human behavior and double dose of crazy makes the film more watchable.  It’s not great; not at all.  But it’s worth a watch for the performances.

    On Saturday morning, I watched the first few episodes of Vikings, the new TV series from the History Channel.  It has much, much higher production values than I expected, and has some pretty good characters.  But it also has some pretty bad ones, and as much as I like Gabriel Byrne he’s top of the list.  His character is so pointlessly vile, and suffering from almost every villain cliché, that the whole thing becomes silly when he’s there.  Of course, his woman is a monster who drives him to do evil, he his own people left and right, he disgraces and dishonors everyone who shows a bit of confidence, and the list goes on.  Without his character (like Danny Huston in Magic City) the show would be noticeably better.  It could deal with a bit more sex and violence, but it doesn’t feel totally off on that count.

    Saturday night, we went out to Warrenton (the sticks) to see Dork-Wife Lisa in a production of Fiddler on the Roof.  It was quite good, with several excellent actors.  The guy who played Tevye was especially good.  And Lisa was really, really excellent.  You could kind of tell that she’s a professional singer.  I’d never seen the movie, or any other live production, so it was all a surprise to me.  And I ended up enjoying it quite a bit.

    I also picked up the new Goldfrapp album, Tales of Us.  It’s pretty good.  More dreamy than dancy.  In fact, I would say her dance roots aren’t even showing here.  And I grabbed Devo’s recent album Something for Everybody.  Some of the tunes are catchy, and they still sound good.  But the thing with Devo is that I feel like their revolutionary spirit turned to bitterness, and while I need to give the songs a more careful listen, the bitterness seems to be showing.

-Matt

Matt’s Week in Dork! (10/6/13-10/12/13)

    Not a whole heck of a lot going on.  I did read Godzilla: The Half-Century War.  Otherwise, just having my spirit crushed.

Jesse James:  Tyrone Power and Henry Fonda are fine in this perfectly OK film version of the classic American outlaw tale.  Pushed too far by railroad men, two brothers fight back…then keep fighting until they become full fledged bandits.  A nice supporting cast helps, but at the end of the day, it’s only an OK movie.  Not bad, but not amazing.

The Return of Frank James:  Henry Fonda reprises his role as Frank James in this sequel to the previous year’s Jesse James.  It too is fine, but nothing special.  If anything, this revenge movie is far too nice, too much of what TV would become.  And the Clem character?  Holy crap does he suck.  Gene Tierney made her big screen debut as a plucky girl-reporter.  Sadly, she’s not very good.  She’s cute enough, and it’s not like she’s terrible or anything.  Just not memorable.  Sort of like rest of the film.  Director Fritz Lang seems to have brought none of his visual flare along with him.

Dinosaur Valley Girls:  You may not expect it, but this movie is garbage.  Sadly, it’s not all that fun either.  I like dinosaurs.  I like dames.  Dinosaurs and dames have made a great combination many times before.  But cavegirls and fake boobs don’t work.  Also, writing is always a plus.  Good writing even more so.

My Young Auntie:  I’m generally not a fan of Hong Kong comedy (or any non-English language comedy).  I find there tends to be too much cultural specific stuff for me to engage in the humor.  And humor is such a monumentally subjective thing, that is very, very difficult to translate.  So, imagine my shock when I found myself enjoying the heck out of this story of a pretty young woman battling expectations and greedy relatives.  The fighting is top notch Shaw Bros. stuff, too.  I’d recommend watching it with the dubbing, as that adds to the amusement.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home:  The first Star Trek film I saw on the big screen is still one of my favorites.  It’s goofy fun, with lots of great lines.  And it’s probably the best film where it comes to giving all the characters moments to shine, especially McCoy and Scotty.  Considering this is one of the most successful films in the series, it’s frustrating that no other movie has imitated it, instead opting for rehashing Wrath of Khan’s formula.  Where are the dilemmas that need solving?  Where is the fun?  No, it’s darkness, war, and the villain that needs to be punched into submission.  Cut it out, Star Trek producers/writers.  It’s time to recapture some of the lighthearted and hopeful spirit of Star Trek IV.

Doctor Who: The Curse of Fenric:  One of the best Sylvester McCoy stories, this one has some good bits, and some interesting ideas.  But it’s still only OK.  As I near the end of McCoy’s run, and of the original Doctor Who series in general, I can absolutely see what it was canceled.  From the last season of Colin Baker on, the writing seems to have gone down the toilet.  Occasional bright spots serve to highlight the overall drop in quality.  And unfortunately, a lot of the worst aspects of this era seem to have been held over into the new series, especially the Stephen Moffat era.

Frankenstein The True Story:  This 3 hour, made for TV adaptation of the classic novel is pretty good.  It’s not as ‘faithful’ to the source material as I’d been led to believe, but it’s still probably the best adaptation of the book.  I have yet to see a film that treats the monster right, but this one seems to have done a better job of capturing the irresponsibility of Victor.  The thing about the original Shelley novel that I always liked is it didn’t actually condemn the science, so much as the lack of responsibility on the part of the scientist.  Adam was not evil, but was driven to do evil by circumstances created and exacerbated by his creator, Victor Frankenstein.  He is an immensely powerful child, given no direction or love by his parent.  This movie does not really get into that aspect of things as much as I’d have liked.  Still, it’s pretty good, and it’s worth seeking out.

    I tried a new wine that I ended up really enjoying.  Dearly Beloved: I Thee Red.  It’s mellow and went with the seared chicken and spicy rice I had for dinner.  I’m not much of a wine guy, so I’m trying out some various types to see if I can develop some kind of appreciation of it.

Human Desire:  Director Fritz Lang, stars Glenn Ford and Gloria Grahame reunite a year after making the amazing film The Big Heat to craft another twisted Noir tale of love and betrayal.  Unfortunately, lightening did not strike twice, and this film is nowhere near as tense, brutal, or compelling as The Big Heat.  It’s not bad, but it’s not especially good, either.  Ford is fine, though he seems a bit out of place as a blue-collar rail worker.  Grahame is fine, too, if a bit shrill.

    So, I’ve had access to cable TV for a few months; the first time since moving to Virginia six years ago.  And generally speaking, it sucks total ass.  But TCM is a pretty cool channel, and on Saturday it gave me a chance to see a couple science fiction films I’d never seen, It Came from Outer Space and The World, The Flesh and the Devil.  TCM, the AFI Silver and to a lesser degree the Alamo Drafthouse have all combined create a kind of ambient noise of classic cinema that has me feeling pretty good about movies, even as I suffer through a dreadful year of film.  Plus, I’ve been catching a bunch of other older films through various other means recently.  It’s been quite nice.

It Came from Outer Space:  In tune with a lot of 50s sci-fi films, this has plenty of heavy-handed moralizing.  The acting is fine and the film looks good.  But the story is meh.  The creature is kind of cool, and I like the way seeing it seems to drive people temporarily mad, like something out of Lovecraft.  The ending is pretty cool; and somewhat unusual for its time.

The World, The Flesh and the Devil:  Harry Belafonte is working underground when something really bad happens.  Finally climbing up into the sun again, he finds himself alone in a desolate New York City.  The first half hour or so is carried completely by Belafonte, and there are moments that remind me of the early part of The Omega Man, making me wonder if this served as something of an inspiration (beyond the novel I Am Legend, obviously).  This certainly covers some similar ground, though without any supernatural/plague element.  When he meets a woman, things become more complicated, and suddenly the racial tensions ramp up.  This becomes even more intense when another man, a white man, arrives on the scene.  How much of their pre-nuke baggage will they hold on to, how much can they cast off?  Once the conflict becomes a three-way, it becomes quite odd, building to a rather strange ending that can’t be accused of being typical.  Good use of early morning New York to create a lifeless world.

Thunder Birds:  On the home front, some young men need to learn the ins and outs of flying.  And of course, along the way, catch the eye of a lovely young lady.  Gene Tierney is that lady, and by Odin’s beard, she’s gorgeous.  From her extremely sexy reveal through her search for love.  Goodness.  The movie is an interesting look into the Wartime attitudes about various things, including people from other countries, romance, and stockings.  By no means a great classic, it’s still quite entertaining.

    That’s about it.  I’ve spent a lot of time staring at the wall this week.  It’s been a rough go.

Get it done!

-Matt

Brad's Week in Dork! (10/7/12-10/13/12)

This week I continued to struggle with the spirit of Halloween.  For the last five years, I've managed to watch 31 Horror Films in 31 Days (well, usually it's more like 62 films in 31 Days), but that streak appears to be over.  Don't get me wrong, I'm gonna keep cranking out the horror this month but my attention just keeps getting pulled elsewhere.  I mean, Taken 2...can you blame me?  And I've been more devoted to comics lately than the silver screen.  Uncanny Avengers, Batman some big things are happening in mainstream comics.  And the countdown to December 5th has begun, Hellboy in Hell will hit soon and I really want to crank through my Dark Horse Library Editions before the next chapter in the saga begins...those BPRD hardcovers as well.

TV OF THE WEEK!

Fringe Season 5 Episode 2 "In Absentia":  We're only two episodes into the final season and I'm trying real hard not to question (or fear) where this Days of Future Past story is going to leave our favorite characters.  I'm just not feeling the evil Observers plot.  But it's too damn early to start bitching.  Fringe is one of my all time favorite shows and I'm willing to sit back and just watch...unless we get to episode 6 and I'm still scratching my head.  Peter & Olivia's daughter bugs me.  Her Machiavellian torture sequence had me groaning a bit.  And Olivia's disapproving stares didn't help.  But Walter is still damn awesome.  Breaking back into Harvard was fun.  "Criterion Collection, Forgive Me."  That's brilliant.  Let's see where this all goes.

MOVIES OF THE WEEK!

Club Dread:  Super Troopers was an odd debut.  A dumb stoner comedy centered around the slackers who inhabit the Vermont State Police.  Not a mega hit, but a definite indie darling.  As far as follow ups go, Club Dread might not have been what fans of Super Troopers were looking for, but I ate it up.  Bill Paxton's washed up party rocker Coconut Pete is too damn funny and there is not enough of him, but this is a Broken Lizard flick and you gotta love these guys if you're gonna get anything outta the soooo stooopid jokey jokes.  A wannabe Jason Vorhees stalks the bikini clad bodies of Pino Coladaburg with Kevin Heffernan's zen master orgasm machine leads the baked staff against the rampaging Fun Police.  I really do enjoy the role reversal going on in Club Dread.  Heffernan goes from the a-hole Farva of Super Troopers to the heroic lead, mystically snatching the heart Brittany Daniel.  Jay Chandrasekhar leaves the straight man routine behind for the dreadlocked buffoonery of Putman.  It's a dumb goof, but I find plenty of chuckles.

Killer Klowns From Outer Space:  I'm still amazed when I find people who've never seen Killer Klowns From Outer Space.  You can't call yourself a movie fan without experiencing the cotton candy horror of the Chiodo Brothers.  The title pulls you in, the clown suits keep you glued, and John Vernon's split mouth puppet routine will terrify you.  Is this a comedy?  Sure.  It's schlocky funny.  But I really do find the whole experience rather unsettling.  The balloon dog squeaks.  The alien, chubby fat grimaces.  Gross.  Weird.  Essential.

House of 1000 Corpses:  Looking back to the year 2003, I'm not really sure why I was so pumped for Rob Zombie's directorial debut.  Maybe I was reading too much Fangoria.  Maybe I listened to the Hellbilly Deluxe album too hard and too often.  But for whatever reason, I was extremely excited to see House of 1000 Corpses.  And then the big day came, and I really hated it.  It wasn't until a few years later with the release of the far superior The Devil's Rejects that I was able to subject myself to the House again.  My problem with this flick has always been the Zombie Kitchen Sink Vomiting approach to storytelling.  It really feels like Zombie thought he'd never direct a film again so he threw in EVERYTHING he loves about horror into one neon mess of a film.  Watching it now I can appreciate that idea.  But I really wish this film was more about the Dr. Satan climax with that beastly gas mask axe wielder and less about the Texas Chainsaw family.  Bill Mosley is great and scary crazy.  Sid Haig is a whole lotta fun as Captain Howdy.  But they're a lot better in Devil Rejects and that's a much better film.  House of 1000 Corpses is just a bright MTV mess.

Taken 2:  So.  Your ex-wife is having marital troubles with the man that replaced you.  Your daughter can't seem to pass her Driver's Ed exam.  How do you pick up their spirits?  Invite them on your business trip to sunny Istanbul.  Nothing bad could possibly happen, right?  It's not like a ring of Albanian mobsters once tried to kidnap your daughter and their really pissed off father is out looking for some Eastern European vengeance...oh wait...maybe the Turkey vacation getaway was not such a good idea.  Taken 2 is more of the same.  And that's awesome.  Boris The Blade sends his lowrent goonsquad (after all, Neeson slaughtered the A Team during the last go around) after Neeson and his fam, and its a brisk 90s minutes of PG-13 butchery.  I take so much pleasure from grizzled ass kicking Neeson breaking necks and shooting ruffians in the back.  Both Maggie Grace & Famke Janssen get a little more screentime, but this is Neeson's show and he excels at murdering the bad guys. They never had a chance; can't wait to see what pathetic group of baddies they dig up for Taken 3.

Twins of Evil:  Maybe not Hammer's finest hour, but Twins of Evil is one of my favorites from the studio.  Peter Cushing is one mean bastard witch finder general and when a swarthy vampire count seduces his twin nieces, his pious killer gets plenty of opportunity to scream and vent his hypocritical rage.  There's a little T and a little A, but not the copious amounts you might expect.  Playboy's Collinson twins get the job done and their vampiric seduction (or half seduction) offers plenty of heaving bosoms and snarling fangs.  Not high art Hammer, but fun enough.

Frankenstein:  Of the Universal Monster Movies, Frankenstein has never been one of my favorites.  I'm a Wolf Man kinda guy.  But my wife has never seen the James Whale classic.  And I thought it was about time we changed that.  However, we started it maybe a little too late, and the work day might have been a touch too long.  15 minutes into this 70 minute film and the Wife was out like a light.  I, of course, continued to watch.  I've seen this film about a half dozen times now.  And you know how everyone champions Boris Karloff's sad face monster?  Well, this was actually the first time I paid attention.  The Monster really is a painfully sad creation.  Actually, this whole film is tremendously sad.  From Boris' puppy dog grunting to the girl in the lake to the father's sad trek through the village.  My head was in the right place to feel the pain of Frankenstein.  I'm still not an uber fan, but when the windmill lights up and the screams start, I just couldn't help but feel the tragedy.

Quartermass II:  Saturday Night was my friend Robert's annual Trilogy of Horror Movie Night.  Every year Matt, Robert, and myself pick a film to subject to each other.  Matt picks a classic horror.  Robert picks a fabulous horror.  And I pick whatever the hell I want.  This year Matt went Hammer.  I've never seen the first Quartermass, but apparently it's not necessary.  Part II is kind of a cross between Invasion of the Body Snatchers and Lovecraft's The Colour Out of Space.  Professor Quartermass is busy with his rocket launch, but when boil inducing meteorites start dropping from the sky his attention is pulled towards a secret government installation and its machine gun packing zombies.  It's a heap of fun with some pretty fantastic effects work.  The Tar Man!  It might be a challenge to score a copy, but if you have the proper back channels than this one is well worth a look.

Vampire Boys:  Well, done Robert.  Well done.  When country boy Jasin moves to LA (you can tell it's LA cuz every three seconds there's an establishing shot of the city) he becomes the target of a shirtless gang of Vampire Boys.  Their leader Caleb believes him to be the one but first he must test him out with an endless series of make-out sessions and the killing of his sadsack roommate Paul.  Wow.  Utterly terrible.  But given how these Trilogy of Horror Movie Nights usually go, this film was nowhere near as painful to watch as some have been in the past.

Phantom of the Paradise:  I'm late to the cult of The Phantom of the Paradise.  But dammit.  I'm a die hard fan now.  Usually with these Movie Nights I pick something gratuitously gory and offensive.  Last year I picked Fulci's The Beyond and the year before that the 80s flamethrower slasher Don't Go Into The House.  But this year my wife was in attendance, and I didn't want to subject her to that kind of splattery terror.  But The Phantom of the Paradise.  It's just a blast.  Weird.  Goofy.  Creepy.  Icky.  Silly.  Fun.  And filled with rocking Paul Williams music.  I've only seen the film a couple of times now, but it is withoutadoubt my favorite Brian De Palma film.  It's a musical riff on both Phantom of the Opera and Faust, but filtered through De Palma's movie maniac brain with an endless parade of split screens, crane shots, wacky filters.  William Finley is beautifully sad as singer songwriter Winslow Leach, and creepy troll Paul Williams is the real monster of the film.  And then there's BEEF!  Long live the metal stylings of BEEF!  If you've never seen Phantom of the Paradise but are well versed in Blow Out, Body Double, and Scarface than you really do owe yourself the sicko treat of Phantom.

COMICS OF THE WEEK!

Aquaman Volume 1 - The Trench:  I'm really trying to catch up on this New 52 business.  Last week was Wonder Woman, this week Aquaman.  And yeah...wow.  This was amazing.  I am flabbergasted at how much I enjoyed this Aquaman comic.  I'm with those other whiney nerds out there that always mocked the Atlantean and his orange scuba suit.  But I'll never do it again.  The New 52 of the DCU brings Arthur back to the surface world with his hot water moccasin wife Mera in tow.  Assaulted by bloggers and bank robbers alike, Aquaman handles the small annoyances with a cocked brow and a piercing trident but when Humanoids From The Deep escape the darkest depths of The Trench its all out ocean war with the fate of both land and sea hanging in the balance.  This is not deep graphic novel storytelling but it is one of the most fun books to come out of this cash cow relaunch.  Batman's still king, but Aquaman ain't too far behind.  And that's an amazing realization to have.

Uncanny Avengers #1:  Step aside DC, Marvel NOW is here!  But this is not a New 52 game changer.  Uncanny Avengers spins right out of the Avengers vs X-Men mini series and since I did not read that book there's a lot of stuff going on here that left me in the dark.  Prof. X is dead.  Cyclops killed him.  Scarlet Witch destroyed the Phoenix force restoring the over population of Mutantkind.  Yeah, ok.  I guess.  Whatever.   This first issue establishes Captain America's desire to address the "mutant issue."  So we're gonna get Cap & Thor & Wolvie & Havok & Rogue & Scarlet Witch.  With the exception of the first three, I do not care about these characters (yet).  The first big bad is gonna be Red Skull and his gang of goat faced weirdos.  I haven't quite drunk the Kool Aid yet.  The art is beautiful and it brings big smiles to see John Cassady drawing a squat Logan again.  And that final page, that's nasty.  But the intro of the Super Villain team was clunky.  And this whole evil Cyclops business is annoying, especially for a former X-Factor obsessive.

Batman #13:  Scott Snyder leaves The Court of Owls behind and enters his next big Batman event:  the return of the Joker!  Sigh.  Honestly, I'm sorta with Matt on this one.  I find it very hard to get excited over another Joker story, especially after the last arc's fascinating exploration of Gotham and it's hidden history.  The Joker's had his face ripped off.  He's Leatherfaced it back on.  He's targeting Batman's allies.  What's new?  Not sure yet.  I'm hoping Snyder's got an ace up his sleeve, and he's gonna knock my socks off with not-just-a-Joker-story.  Capullo's art is great.  He draws gross perfectly.  And that last page?  I just don't see the status quo getting rocked here.

Batgirl #13:  I got suckered.  Death of the Family crossover.  Yeah, don't think so.  This is the concluding chapter to some Batgirl adventure with a little hint at a tie-in with the last couple of pages.  Frankly, I don't know what happened in this book.  Barbara Gordon's is battling some Azrael wannabe vigilante and gets the crapped kicked outta her before she kicks the crap outta the baddie.  Can't say it was bad.  Can't say it was good.  Don't got no idea what's going on in this book.  Matt says this new Batgirl title is decent and I guess at some point I'll start from the beginning.

Archer & Armstrong #3:  As promised last issue - Ninja Nuns!!!!  Also known as "Nunjas!"  Not sure if I really dug this book from the start or not, but I'm all in at this point.  But I'm even more excited as to where this book is going than where it currently rests.  There's a lot of silly stuff here on top of some rather biting commentary and I can easily see why some folks might get ruffled by the content.  Get over it, I say.  Archer goes up against his adopted sister Mary-Maria and it's only going to get more brutal.  So far, Archer's life has been turned upside down and I cannot wait to see him hit rock bottom.  Armstrong's a lark and I love his blasphemous history.  Hercules, what a drunk.

Bloodshot #4:  Another solid comic from Valiant.  We get a flashback of a mind controlled Bloodshot "containing" a gray goo outbreak and its gross.  It also reveals the kiddie version of Pulse's first encounter with the killing machine.  In the present day, they reluctantly team up against the G-Man stooge pulling their reins.  I'm excited to see the building of the supporting cast and I'm looking forward to Bloodshot taking the war back to his handlers.  The man is seriously messed up and he owes a lot of folks a helluva a payback.

The Creep #2:  Two issues in (well, three cuz #0 really should have been a #1) and The Creep is taking its time with the plot.  Oxel continues his investigation into the double teen suicide and its obvious that the crazybrains homeless man father is central to the case.  But its rather hard to get excited about.  This feels like something I won't appreciate until its over and done with...or at the very least this book is going to read much better in trade than singles.

Stumptown #2:  Like The Creep, I think this will be better in trade.  And I think I might just hold off on this mystery until more issues have hit the stand.  PI Dex has a mysterious encounter with a roadie.  The police prick their ears to the case.  And the missing guitar doesn't seem to be that much missing.  What's the big deal anyway?  Why should we care?  So far, I don't.  I'll stay for Greg Rucka.

Hawken #5 & #6:  Tim & Ben Truman's weird Western comes to a close...or does it?  Hawken has his final showdown with the noseless beast, Sombre and it's some solid action thanks to the gnashing teeth of the Fiji mermaid.  Can't really say I was completely enamored with this book, but it's close enough to those old Truman/Lansdale Jonah Hex books to be worth the price.  And I genuinely hope this character doesn't just fade into memory.

Hellboy Library Edition Volume 2:  Next week is another meeting of my wife's Ultimate Justice League of Extraordinary Book Club and Mike Mignola's The Chained Coffin & Others is the graphic novel of the week.  The group wanted to do something in the spirit of Halloween and with a little pushing from Robert we agreed upon the third Hellboy volume...which just happens to be the book that got me back into comics in the early 2000s.  It's an amazing short story collection pitting paranormal bouncer Hellboy against a horrible collection of mythological beasties.  This was just the excuse I needed to dive back into the Mignolaverse and crack open my library editions.  Volume 2 contains the two very best Hellboy short story collections, The Chained Coffin & The Right Hand of Doom.  In the wake of recent sagas like Darkness Calls & The Wild Hunt (Volume 5), it's fascinating to see how little tales like "The Corpse" and "Box Full of Evil" laid the groundwork for future horrors.  How the embarrassment of one baby snatching fairy could lead to epic levels of vengeance.  Still, my favorite story in this book is "The Wolves of St. August" in which Hellboy encounters a group of spectral werewolves in Eastern Europe.  The art is still in a period of transition but "St August" perfectly mixes that classic Universal Monsters mood with HB's on-the-job plumber mentality.  Workman Monster Bashing.

Hellboy Library Edition Volume 1:  Going back to the beginning, the first mini-series Seed of Destruction is far from perfect Hellboy reading.  Co-scripted with John Byrne, the story reads rather clunky and a lot of the characters don't feel like themselves.  Abe is a fake beard wearing fishman hiding in the shadows while Big Red struts in the open.  And even by Hellboy's standards, the first story is smothered with thick exposition.  It's all set up.  Hellboy's earthly introduction.  Nazis.  Rasputin.  The Dragon.  The Plague of Frogs.  It's all starts here, but it's all better elsewhere.  The second mini-series, Wake The Devil is the real start of the Hellboy adventure.  You've got another lost Nazi experiment, Project Vampir Sturm led by the Napoleanic madman Vladimir Giurescu.  The introduction of big bad Hecate and her iron maiden snake skin.  And you have the spirit of Rasputin still struggling to puppet master the Lovecraftian destruction and rebirth of the universe.  Oh, and let's not forget the Baba Yaga, the Russian witch seeking restitution for her missing eye.  Seriously, how can you not love a book that brings so much pulp and fantasy together?  Hellboy is the ultimate expression of genre.  If you're not interested than I don't get you and I don't want to; just sit back and rewatch Steel Magnolias.

--Brad