Matt’s Week in Dork! (4/8/12-4/14/12)

All right!

    This week seems to have happened, but I’m not really sure where I was for most of it.  Watching the Val Lewton movies feels like forever ago, but I didn’t exactly light the world on fire with grand adventures or anything.  Ah, well.


Futurama Season Six (part 2):  “Better cover your nads.  It may get a little non-Newtonian in here.”  While the later seasons of this show tend to lack some of the awesomeness of the first two, there’s still a lot of awesome, and a few really great episodes.  This second half of the season features mostly good episodes, some really good.  I love The Simpsons, but Futurama is just my kind of thing.  I really love it, even when it’s not totally up to snuff.

The Leopard Man:  Val Lewton produces another Noirish, psychological horror tale.  I love how these movies take such sensationalistic titles and turn them into thoughtful, eerie, and moody tales that leave just the right things vague.

Ghost Ship:  On his first journey out to sea, a young officer tries to come to terms with the strange ways of his new captain.  Is the captain just unusual, or is he a dangerous madman?  As usual in Lewton produced films, the characters aren’t simple, and not always what they appear.  I don’t get the whispering mute’s narration, though.  It’s awkward.

Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery:  Parodies of James Bond and the like aren’t new.  Matt Helm, Flint, and others have been around for some time.  But Austin Powers still manages to get me in fits of laughter.  It’s clever.  It’s low brow.  The plays on 60s film and culture, seen through the eyes of the 90s make the film an unintentionally interesting time capsule.  Just watch out for those ill tempered mutant sea bass.

Vanessa:  I’m curious if there was some specific reason so many Euro-smut movies were filmed in Hong Kong during the 70s.  Simply a matter of budget?  I wonder.  Wall to wall nudity is A-OK in my book, and this movie has it.  But I found other aspects of oddly charming.  Like the crazy black magic sub-plot with the guy who looks like Nick Cave.  The almost random way the story drifts along.  Awesome.  And oddly, there are some genuinely beautiful shots.  I don’t know if they were intentional or not.  But one specific moment while the title character is riding in a boat on the harbor is really nice.  Frankly, it belongs in a better movie.  For Euro-trash, this one is fairly entertaining.

Police Academy:  Super 80s, with extremely broad humor and lots of goofy acting, this is still a great deal of fun.  Is it good?  No, not really.  Is it funny?  No, not really.  But it’s pleasantly goofy.  And it’s fully of 80s ‘that guy’ actors.  What I found really odd is that it’s barely even an R rated film.  My memory of it was that it was very strong, but other than a couple boobs and a few lewd jokes, there’s hardly anything especially offensive.

Rough Magic:  There’s a good story here; a good concept.  It just doesn’t work.  Not only because the final act feels forced and the finale descends into romantic comedy schlock and awkward humor, buy because it feels like nobody was quite sure what kind of movie was being made.  On the one hand, it kind of goes for it with its whole post-WWII, hardboiled Mexican adventure with a dash of Indiana Jones or even Clive Barker.  But, on the other hand, it never follows through nearly enough to become the weird fantasy it wants to be, nor does it get gritty enough for a solid Noir-like tale.  Hints of Lord of Illusions and similar weird tales are tantalizing but ultimately doomed by standard 90s gutless filmmaking.  I’m not a fan of Fonda at all, and I can take or leave Russell Crowe, but both do a good enough job here.  If only the film had been a little more bold.

The Extraordinary Voyage (Le voyage extraordinaire): A pleasant documentary from France, this would have been a great special feature on a DVD collection of subject Georges Milies’ silent films.  As a stand-alone, it’s informative, but feels a bit too short, too surface.  There is a lot of original Milies footage, which is nice, and some frequently clever use of stock footage.  But probably the highlight of the documentary is the explanation and demonstration of the actual process of film deterioration and restoration.  The primary focus is on the restoration of A Trip to the Moon to its original hand tinted color splendor.  I’d have liked this to be a longer documentary, dealing with more of Milies’ films and with their production and distribution.  But, as a primer, it’s nice.  And if you watched last year’s Hugo, you should surely see this.

A Trip to the Moon (Le voyage dans la lune):  110 years old, this 14 minute film is still fascinating and funny.  The theatrical nature of the sets and costumes, and the dream-quality created by combining them with hand tinted colors create a weird dream world akin to puppet shows or fairy tales.   Seeing it on the big screen at the AFI theater in Silver Spring Maryland was a real treat.

Torchwood Miracle Day:  The fourth season of the show sees Jack and Gwen making some new friends and rebirthing Torchwood when suddenly everyone stops dieing.  Things get exceptionally grim very quickly, as the meat-hook reality eternal life, especially without eternal youth, sets in.  The population begins to spike, illness becomes epidemic, economies and governments begin to fail.  In the kind of mid-point of the series, things wander, becoming a bit too serial-like, with too many twists for the sake of having them.  The last couple episodes bring things back in line, thankfully.  There are lots of surprising cast choices that come and go across the season, the production values are nice, and I enjoy the world hopping, not just from Wales to the US, but beyond.  Though not nearly as strong as Children of Earth, Miracle Day is still a fairly good season.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy:  Look, I know the book is funny.  It’s very, very funny.  I just don’t enjoy reading comic fiction.  Funny books are fine, but I don’t find funny novels engaging, no matter how funny they are.  So, while I have always enjoyed the idea of Douglas Adams’ books, I’ve never actually enjoyed reading them.  But, I liked the TV show, audio versions of the book, and I’m sure I’d dig the radio show that started it all.  And you know what?  I really enjoy the movie version.  Exceptionally British, clever, silly, weird, and beautifully realized, I simply like it.  It’s a flurry of nutty bits flying at your brain, without a lot of time spent explaining itself.  If you like a healthy dose of the unusual, give it a go.

    Also watched a couple episodes of Charlie’s Angels last week, while I was killing some time.  Even though I do like Cheryl Ladd, I’m just not feeling the second season like I did the first.  It’s still fun, but…I don’t know.

    Tuesday night, while Brad and Lisa were nice enough to put up with me for a few hours, and we watched the great American classic Police Academy, we also finally cracked into the much anticipated (by Brad and me) Axe Cop Munchkin.  Wow.  I’ve played three variants; the original, Cthulhu Munchkin, and now Axe Cop, and I have to say, Axe Cop is the most fun yet.  The rules are pretty much the same.  It’s not a different game exactly.  Just that the crazy of Munchkin and the crazy of Axe Cop seem to complement each other exceedingly well.  I look forward to more rounds of that game soon.  Which reminds me, I have to host another game night…which reminds me, I should have posted my write-up about the last game night a long time ago…which reminds me how much not having consistent internet is starting to be a real drag.  In some ways, it’s great.  But when push comes to shove, I’d rather have it.

    On the book front, I finished a book about Celtic mythology (read my review here).  But didn’t really tap into any graphic novels this week.  I did see a couple super-sweet hardcover reproductions of first edition Edgar Rice Burroughs, A Princess of Mars and Tarzan.  Very nice volumes, but also not cheap, and I’m not a collector, as such.  I’m probably going to have to get the Disney editions that came out just before the movie, though, as they’ve finally reprinted the whole series in three volumes, instead of the first three, or at best, the first five, like everyone else.  And I saw that there’s a Kolchack: The Night Stalker graphic novel out there from Moonstone.  Now, Moonstone hasn’t exactly wowed me before, with their typically low quality art and not especially inspired writing.  But, I do love Kolchack.  Has anyone read it?  If so, what are your thoughts?

    I also read (?) the first volume of Owly.  Short and simple as it is (it took me about 10 minutes to finish the 157 pages), I’m not going to post a full review, so here are my thoughts after reading it:  The first volume of Andy Runton’s Owly contains two stories, The Way Home and The Bittersweet Summer.  With little animal characters, image balloons instead of dialog, and simple messages about life and nature, these stories are great for little ones.  But, honestly, as an adult, I still found the brief tales heartening.

    Last minute, I scored a copy of Iron Butterfly’s Heavy, which is very groovy.  I’ve been in the mood for trippy 60s/70s type stuff lately, enjoying some Blue Oyster Cult, Deep Purple, Procol Harum, and the like.  Not sure what that’s all about, except that Spring often makes me feel nostalgic, sometimes in gut wrenching ways.

-Matt

Brad's Week In Dork! (4/8/12-4/14/12)

Life without The Wire.  Sigh.  I miss it.  So how do I fill the void?  By rediscovering the Police Academy franchise!  Madness.  I've owned the box set of the seven films for a few years now but have never cracked into them.  Maybe because I knew that they couldn't possibly be as good as my seven year old brain remembered them.  Still, it was fun to force The Wife & Matt to watch the first film as we played Axe Cop Munchkin and even though the laughs are few & far between I have enough nostalgia to carry the day.  Don't think The Wife got it, but Matt seemed to enjoy the 80sness.

But I didn't get a whole lot of TV watching done or read a single comic or book.  And the only Dork Adventure I had came at the end of the week when I returned to my favorite spot in all of DC, the AFI Silver for a screening of the new 2011 restoration of A Trip to the Moon and the documentary, The Extraordinary Voyage.  Considering my adoration of last year's Hugo it was a great treat to see this hundred year old movie up on the big screen.  And the documentary provided for plenty of subtext.

TV OF THE WEEK!

Justified "Slaughterhouse":  Season 3 has come to a close.  Looking back, it was probably my least favorite season of Justified so far, but you still have to consider that the worst season of Justified is still the best season of anything else currently running on the boob tube.  All the plot points pretty much ended where I thought they were going to, but the finale provided for a helluva emotional downbeat for poor ol' Raylan and I was surprised to shed a few tears for the marshal.  The Mexican Standoff between Raylan, Quarles, and Limehouse was fantastic and the resulting bit of gory humor got a serious laugh from The Wife and myself.  But what I'm really curious about is to see how this season plays during a marathon run of episodes.  Will I enjoy it more?  I'm guessing so.  In the next few months I'm gonna restart Justified from the beginning and blitz through the entire Raylan saga.  But first I want to read Elmore Leonard's Riding the Rap & Pronto.

MOVIES OF THE WEEK!

Timerider - The Adventure of Lyle Swann:  A seriously goofy time travel story written by one of The Monkees! Timerider sees Fred Ward's dirt bike champion accidentally sent back into the Wild West. There he must battle silver fanged Peter Coyote, who wants the Fire Horse riding machine to reclaim Confederate pride and win the heart of Belinda Bauer's zipper fetishist. Lots of That Guy! actors pop up: LQ Jones' hate-fueled marshall, Ed Lauter's shotgun preacher, Tracey Walter's noseless bandit, and Richard Masur's honor bound henchman. If you're looking for something to pair with The Philadelphia Experiment or Back to the Future Part III look no further.  More fanboy love to be found in this week's cineAWESOME! review.

American Grindhouse:  As with a lot of these kinda docs, there's nothing really new to be found for the uninitiated, but if you're just sinking your teeth into the world of exploitation you'll find plenty of recommendations and warnings. It's always fun to listen to talking heads like John Landis, Joe Dante, Jack Hill, Fred Williamson, Fred Olen Ray, etc...but I also appreciated how the doc went all the way back to Edison and highlighted some of the really kinky stuff from the silents and pre-code talkies. Still, there were a couple of faces missing here. Where was Roger Corman? Where was Wes Craven? Too busy? Doubt it.

Machete Maidens Unleashed:  Narrowing the focus of exploitation celebration to the 1960s/70s explosion of Filipino shot grindhouse extravaganzas, Machete Maidens Unleashed revels in the typical B Movie classics-to-some (The Big Doll House, the Blood Island saga) but also the awkward reality of the Hollywood (or Off Hollywood) funded dictatorship. Savage! needs some helicopters? Sure, just wait till they finish bombing the rebels. As you can imagine there's lots of great low budget camp fire storytelling from Roger Corman, Chris Mitchum, Pam Grier, Brian Trenchard-Smith, Sid Haig, as well as a plethora of once ready-and-willing-actresses. Whatever you gotta do to get The Hot Box filmed, you do it. You might see Feminism at work or John Landis might be right with crys of "Bullshit." But as he also states, sometimes the most fun films come from the most amoral of filmmakers.

Police Academy:  Watching the film now, it's a mystery how these old man jokes made a 7 year old Brad roll with laughter, but next to the Star Wars films, there was no other franchise as cool as Police Academy. It's very existence and the King Cool status of Steve Guttenberg is proof of the the magic that coursed through the 1980s. I'm guessing that if I watched this series now, without any sense of nostalgia, it would be easy to dismiss, but as is, I find Police Academy to be tremendous amounts of fun. Bubba Smith, Kim Cattrall, Michael Winslow, GW Bailey--I want to be in school with these guys--I want to battle ravaging extras on the backlots of TJ Hooker!

The Dallas Connection:  "That was some scene up there, remind me never to have sex with you." A trilogy of female assassins led by Julie Strain's Black Widow use the power of their fake breasts to lure their pray and steal an all-too-important-for-some-reason computer chip. The first film in the Malibu Express series to be directed by Andy Sidaris' son Drew, The Dallas Connection is wall-to-wall with awkwardly unsexy sex scenes (which is nothing new to this saga), but Strain's bad girl schtick is getting old. I miss the charm of Donna Spier's righteous government agent and even though I'm happy to see some of the regulars like Bruce Penhall and Rodrigo Obregon, the ladies are really lacking. Samantha Max, Cobra, Scorpion....where's the fun?

Into The Abyss:  The latest documentary from Werner Herzog has the air of a 48 Hours True Crime Special as it details the murders of Sondra Stotler, her son Adam, and his friend Jeremy Richardson by 18 year olds Michael Perry (sentenced to death) and Jason Burkett (sentenced to life without parole). Herzog is up front at the start, he does not agree with the Death Penalty. But what I appreciate about this film is the balance that's struck between two opposing viewpoints. If you go in pro, you'll probably leave pro. If you go in anti, you'll probably leave anti. For the most part, Herzog lets the participants speak their mind (he does occasionally force in his Herzogian wisdom) and the picture that's painted is an incredibly depressing saga of ignorant futility. A world of sons inheriting the family business of incarceration. And there are no easy outs for the perpetrators or the victims of this tragedy. It just is.

Police Academy 2 - Their First Assignment:  Even as a kid the first sequel in the Police Academy franchise was always my least favorite. The Gute and the rest of the graduates leave the school behind to join the hellhole of Johnny Fever's 16th Precinct. There are a couple of fun, goofy bits involving Michael Winslow's sudden Kung Fu skills that will serve him well in the rest of the sequels, and Tackleberry's relationship with his lady partner is somewhat cute, but the Bobcat gang feels more 80s TV than 80s movie and the script is not clever enough to handle the drop from R to PG. I'm just saying, a few more F bombs could have been a nice distraction from the hokum.

The Hot Box:  Jonathan Demme's introduction into the Corman School was this politically tinged T&A shoot 'em up about a group of nurses kidnapped by jungle revolutionaries and set against themselves as well as a corrupt murderous government. Margaret Markov is surprisingly entertaining as the whiny one and Charles Dierkop is always good for a scary screaming villain. The film delivers on the three Bs: Blood, Bullets, & Boobs and the final machine gun free-for-all is abnormally loud and held together by a string of rapid deaths. Not as Exploitation Epic as I was hoping, but it's good proving ground for Demme before he landed behind the camera of Caged Heat.

Police Academy 3 - Back in Training:  After a brief getaway, the franchise returns to where it belongs...at the Police Academy. And the graduates from the first film are now the instructors of the third; Lassard's school going up against Mauser's school with The Gute committing eyebrow hijinks and Jones mastering the powers of levitation via mysterious kung fu. If it wasn't already, the franchise is completely kids stuff at this point and the only way to find entertainment is to tap into that nonsensical, idiot seven year old within. If you still have that ability, enjoy.

The Cabin in the Woods:  If you've seen a single trailer you already know that this is not a simple college kids in an Evil Dead cabin story, but don't worry, that's not really a spoiler either since the opening scene with Richard Jenkins & Bradley Whitford firmly establishes the Big Brother House narrative. Joss Whedon is all over this script and your enjoyment will depend on how much you can handle his brand of winking humor; The Cabin in the Woods feels a lot like something you would find in his Buffy Season 8 comics and as much as I enjoyed his ha-ha satirizing of the genre, I still managed to find the archetypes tiring. But when the film goes Sci-Fi Channel bonkers, it's plenty fun.

A Trip to the Moon:  2012 is the 100th Anniversary of Georges Melies's surrealist adaptation of Jules Verne's From The Earth to the Moon & HG Wells' First Men In The Moon. Having garnered a lot of attention this past year thanks to Martin Scorsese's Hugo, I highly recommend that you jump on over to YouTube and check it out. However, if you really want to give it a serious spin you should pick up the 2011 Restored Color Print now available on blu ray from Flicker Alley. It will never look pristine, but this new edition is absolutely gorgeous. The visual trickery on display is thrilling, and there are heaps of humor to be discovered as these brave astronauts fend off spiny, butt dragging Selenites and claim glory for France. VF.

--Brad