Matt’s Week in Dork! (12/30/12-1/5/13)

    On Monday night, I attended Lisa and Brad’s New Years party, which was also Lisa’s birthday party.  I thought I was finishing up a cold, but it turned out I hadn’t even begun to fight.  The rest of the week was dominated by cold medication and attempts at sleep (including two 12 hour stretches).  So, I didn’t do much, outside of watching some movies, sleeping, and propping myself up at my job (sometimes reacting as though conscious).  At least I’m finally getting past it.  Ah health.


The Bloody Vampire:  “Look at it.  Look at it!”  Man, that was a boring and silly vampire movie.  Bad dubbing makes for some humorous moments, but otherwise, it’s a tough slog.  Not much happens.  A lot of people talk a lot.  Bad editing seems to kill most of the victims.  The end doesn’t work at all.

Jack Reacher:  Tom Cruise is a former cop who doesn’t play by the rules.  Yup.  It’s one of those movies.  Very 80s, with lots of moments that show Tom…I mean, Jack is oh, so cool.  It’s a bit sanitized, with much of the violence off camera, or cut away from.  But it’s still pretty violent (on a James Bond level, I guess).  And it’s fun, but fairly forgettable.  Herzog is kind of awesome, if somewhat pointless, as the villain.  And Rosamund Pike’s near cosmic cleavage should probably get its own agent, if not become a licensed hypnotist.

Wrath of the Titans:  “We had power before we had weapons.”  Breaking away from the remake territory of the first film, this is a more original, and more interesting story.  Plus, Sam Worthington is a lot less dull this time round (still not very exciting).  One of the things I like about this is that the monsters are monstrous.  The chimera at the beginning is straight-up disgusting.  I’m never a big fan of the ‘the magic is dying,’ ‘the time of the gods is ending’ kind of thing.  But, this is still a good deal of fun.  There’s a whole fathers and sons thing going here, which I guess is pretty common in fantasy film.  Fantasy in general, really, going back to the mythologies that gave rise to our religions.

GOD FIGHT!!!

    So, that was 2012.  Not really the best year.  But not the worst.  Living on my own has been fantastic.  I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep it up forever, but it has been a really good experience.  Keeping my own schedule without worry, just being free like you can’t be with a roommate, it’s awesome.  Not having internet has been a pain.

Sucker Punch:  I’m all for Mondo filmmaking.  Crank it to 11.  Go for it.  Don’t hold back.  Or, as they said in the 80s, ‘take it to the limit.’  So, when I saw the totally insane trailer for Sucker Punch, I thought, ‘Yes!  Here is my kind of madness.’  After all, Zack Snyder had made a whole bunch of movies I’d really enjoyed (the Dawn of the Dead remake, 300, Legend of the Guardians, Watchmen).  So an epic, dimension shifting pile of crazy with some girls slow-motion destroying their way through WWI battlefields, fantasy castles, and futuristic weirdness?  You know I’m down with all that.  But this movie is a mess, a total, aggravating mess.  Scattered, poorly thought out, disjointed, and too often emotionally forced, at every turn, it could be something really fantastic, but isn’t.  If it were limited to either one reality (best case), or two realities (if absolutely necessary) it might have worked.  But the third level of reality spoils everything, talking away the power of anything that happens.  Why does it matter if it’s a dream?  It really doesn’t matter if it’s a dream within a dream.  I mean, she’s imagining she’s a badass warrior while she’s imagining she’s dancing in a whorehouse, while she’s in an institution.  Ugh.  It doesn’t help that all the girls (many very pretty) are done up to look about as disgusting as could be.  The worst being Emily Browning, who looks like an anime fanboy/pedophile jackpot in her schoolgirl costume and ridiculous fake blond pigtails.  The film is such a disappointment, as any one of the dream settings might have made for a cool place for a complete story, especially the crazy fantasy-WWI.  Instead, each visit serves as a reminder of how the film could have been much better.

All Skanky on the Western Front

There Was a Crooked Man…:  I guess in the 70s people just liked their humor mixed with horror.  Cracking jokes one minute, and stone cold murder the next.  Ha ha ha, he killed that guy accidentally.  Ha ha ha, that woman is going to get raped.  Ha ha ha, a whole bunch of people got killed.  Oh, that rapscallion got a bunch of people shot down like dogs…isn’t he a charmer.  Like with my recent viewing of Fuzz (and movies like Mother Jugs and Speed and Mash) I find the humor in poor taste and most of the characters impossible to like.

Ha ha ha.  Murder.

Venture Bros. Season 4:  “He musta gut sucked into my enigma hole.”  Hunter and Brock talking about how sad a stripper’s breasts were had me actually crying with laughter.  I don’t know that this season is quite as good as earlier ones, but it’s still pretty danged funny.  Part of the problem is that Hatred is a much bigger part, and frankly, less is more with Hatred.  Though, when Hank becomes a private dick, there’s a whole lot of the old magic.  And Henchmen 21’s story is fantastic.

Doctor Who:  Revelation of the Daleks:  “Only fools would take the risks I do.” Doctor Who was such a strange show, and this story introduces a really nutty situation.  On a winter planet that is devoted to funerary arrangements, something rotten waits.  An evil mastermind’s head in a jar, the requisite idealist rebels, wacky 80s hair…zombies?  The later run of classic Who was downright nuts, with an almost surrealist/satirist streak akin to some UK comics, like 2000AD (featuring Judge Dredd!).  Several odd characters with their own somewhat extreme motivations are thrust together in a typical downward spiral of violence and madness.

Cosmopolis:  Look, David Cronenberg has made many great films.  So the man gets a bit of leeway from this film fan.  But after last year’s pretty darned disappointing Dangerous Method, this pretentious snooze-fest came as a pretty rough body blow.  It’s all people talking at each other, saying half-baked snippets of pseudo-intellectual stuff the actors clearly don’t understand.  Everyone seems drugged and listless.  There’s a lot of anxiety about technology and the future, themes Cronenberg has explored much more successfully and interestingly before.  I was reminded of the William Gibson documentary No Maps for These Places (I think that’s what it was called), which though it featured a lot of interesting stuff from Gibson, was so painfully arty (ART!!!) it was hard to sit through.  This  is the kind of thing I imagine college film students going nuts for.

I can't believe I'm listening to this crap.

Beasts of the Southern Wild:  “Want a chicken biscuit?”  In a strange world of have nots and crazies, people await the apocalyptic storm that is destined to drown them all.  Separated from the dry, safe world by the levy, people party and live with passion, because they’ve got no future.  A little girl watches the world with the wide eyes and a brave heart.  Her father is kind of a monster, but his brutish ways teach her self reliance, community, passion, and a will to survive.  There’s obviously a post-Katrina vibe to this film, but the world created feels like something out of a cyberpunk novel, with people on the outside of the technologic world.  These are the people who would live on the underside of Gibson’s domes.  In spirit, it reminds me somewhat of Tideland, in that it captures the pain, the fear, and the wonder of being a child, learning to deal with loss, danger, and the inevitable ends of things.

Killing Car:  I Know What You Did Last Summer as made by Jean Rollin.  If memory serves, this was Rollin’s first film after a fairly lengthy hiatus.  And it is missing a couple of his signature bits, like two women and a graveyard.  Still, you can tell it’s his work.  Not a lot of dialog, what there is doesn’t make a lot of sense, slow pace, dreamy logic, and a bunch of nudity.  It’s certainly not one of his better movies.  Partly, it’s the lackluster leading lady, party it’s the more obvious than usual budgetary limitations.  I don’t know, maybe there was too linear a plot for a Rollin film?  If you like the director’s work, you might as well check it out.  If not, this won’t win you over.  And if you’re unfamiliar with his work, this isn’t a good place to start.

Predators:  A bunch of predators and a bunch of Predators battle it out on a hostile world.  This is a much more proper sequel to the original film, and I’d like to see them go on in this fashion.  The cast is good, the effects are good, the action is good.  And it’s a cool story and setting (if simple).  There are lots of callbacks to the original, but the film is hardly slave to it.  Solid.  Now, when is the next one coming?

The Wolfman:  Clearly inspired by the original Universal Monster classic, I think this actually feels more akin to the Gothic horror of Hammer, with mist shrouded moors, deep family secrets, Gypsies, and fearful peasants.  I’m not in love with the CG, but it doesn’t totally suck.  I’m also not a huge fan of the wolfman design, but honestly, I didn’t like the original Universal one all that much either.  I guess I like my werewolves more biped wolf than man with wolf features.  It’s a pretty good flick, and I really like the mood of it.  I wish more horror movies would remember mood, instead of focusing so much on cheep jumpy bits.  It’s easy to startle people.  It’s hard to capture mood.

Intimate Confessions of a Chinese Courtesan:  “Don’t ever mess with Lady Chun.”  This movie seems to be sleazy when it shouldn’t be, and chaste when it should be more sleazy.  After abuse and the murder of an attempted savior, a young woman becomes the ultimate courtesan…for revenge!  There is some pretty cool fighting in this one, and some awesome sets.  But I had a hard time getting into the story, partly because the characters were generally unlikable.

Legend of the Guardians: The Owls of Ga’Hoole:  An epic fantasy quest movie featuring heroic…owls?  It’s impressive how much emotion animators are able to get out of completely inhuman CG animals (sadly, more than many human actors seem capable of).  It’s really a gorgeous film, with shot after shot looking like some classic fantasy paperback cover art.  And interesting cast of characters, a dangerous journey, action packed battles, betrayals and heroics.  The only sour note is the crappy auto-tuned pop-song montage, seemingly an industry standard for kid aimed animation.  But the patented Zack Snyder slow-mo mixed with classic WWI style air combat (with owls instead of biplanes), is kind of cool.

An Angel for Satan:  This is a surprisingly sharp looking movie; one of those late black & white films that has the look of a modern movie done without color for reasons of style.  Barbara Steele is an odd one.  She’s almost beautiful, but somehow repellent at the same time.  Something about her Susan Sarandon eyes, I think.  Like they’re gonna fall right out of her face if she gets too upset.  And as is not uncommon in women with especially distinct features, she aged quickly, and not well.  Still, she is striking in her way.  The movie doesn’t feel Italian, and sadly, that’s because it’s technically well made.  Story wise it feels like something out of Roger Corman’s Poe era.  Replace the Count with Vincent Price, and the village idiot with Jack Nicholson, and nobody would know the difference.  Overall, not too bad.

    Other than that, I think the only thing I accomplished was reading a short story from A. Bertram Chandler’s To the Galactic Rim, With Good Intentions.  It was pretty good.  Really, that’s about it.

-Matt

Matt’s Week in Dork! (4/1/12-4/7/12)

    Not too much going on this week.  A bunch of TV series watching, I guess.  And a bit of reading.  No major adventures.

Doomsday:  Starting with Escape from New York and a dash of 28 Days Later, then mixing a little Aliens, a healthy dash of Mad Max, and let simmer.  Then, just as you’re settled in, take a swig of Excalibur.  Yup.  It’s a weirdass hodgepodge of other movies, and it’s a heck of a lot of fun.  When it was released, it felt like I was finally seeing the return of R-rated cinema.  Blood, violence, over the top nuttiness.  I’m not putting this up for an Oscar or anything, but if you want some fun apocalyptic adventure with some colorful characters, it’ll do nicely.

The Invention of Lying:  Extremely subversive and genuinely cute, this romantic comedy for atheists features a charming cast, some clever scripting, and a few laugh out loud moments.  And there are a few pretty powerful emotional scenes to boot.  Genre cliché still poke their head in on more than one occasion, but the overall feature is still very enjoyable.

Batman: The Brave and the Bold: Season Two Part Two:  More and more of the most insane DC characters to pop out of some comicbook writers’ fevered brains do the dance with the Dark Knight.  When you see GI Robot, the Haunted Tank, and the Doom Patrol, you just know it’s madness.  And then Scooby and the gang drop by.  Wow.  This show has so much fun with the crazy, stupid characters of the 60s and 70s.  Plus, it’s genuinely clever and surreal.  Great stuff.  Though on the complete other end of the spectrum, this is my favorite animated Batman since the 90s’ Batman: The Animated Series.

Wrath of the Titans:  I know some hold the original Clash of the Titans in pretty high esteem.  Stop-motion master Ray Harryhausen’s last film sports some cool creatures, and as a boy I thought it was the bee’s knees.  But, honestly, it’s boring as all get out.  The recent remake was surprisingly enjoyable, for a bunch of CG flash, and it wasn’t boring.  This follow-up was shockingly entertaining.  Oh, sure, I could deal with 100% less shaky-cam, something that has LONG outstayed its welcome but won’t go away.  But the story, freed from its remake shackles, is satisfactorily Greco-mythological.  The creatures are cool, the action exciting, and there’s some genuine humor that doesn’t feel out of place.  There’s also a twist in the Zeus/Hades story that I didn’t see coming, but absolutely loved.  I could have watched a whole movie about them, frankly.  Like the first film, I wish there’d been more Danny Huston though.  Man, if I were a kid right now, I’d be in hog heaven.  With these two films, plus Immortals and 300, my love of fantastic Greece would be through the roof.  Heck, it’s half way there now.

Pandorum:  Certainly not a perfect science fiction film, it does capitalize on some of my favorite tropes.  A guy wakes up on a spaceship that has seen better days and needs to find out who he is, what’s been happening, how long he’s been asleep, where the ship is, and what the heck those horrible things running around in the halls are.  With the help of a superior officer, a savage scientist and a crazy warrior farmer (and a few other friends he meets along the way), he may just be able to save everyone.  Creepy sets, nasty monsters, and some cool ideas make this one worth a watch.  There is a twist near the end I found annoying.  And at one point, I thought it was going to have a twist that would ruin the film in my mind (but thankfully, it didn’t happen).  Overall, it’s a good watch.

The Dallas Connection:  Look, I know this is some kind of irrational, chauvinist, and generally wrong thinking, but I don’t like Texas.  Sorry.  There it is.  This isn’t based on first hand experience, or any of the things that one truly needs to make this kind of judgment.  It’s purely based on perception, through the image typically portrayed in movies, TV, and frankly, by Texans themselves.  There’s a sinister embracing of belligerence, stupidity, and profound tackiness that I find alien to my idea of right.  From ‘boot scooting’ and country music, to cowboy hats and rhinestones, it’s like a whole state built on the core concept of  pissing me off.  That rant is to establish why by this point in the series, I’m really missing Hawaii.  The switch to Texas is making it hard for me to continue enjoying the otherwise same-old same-old of the Sidaris T&A action mega-series.  This movie is a real family affair, with a Sidaris in nearly every behind the camera position, but it lacks the charm of many of the earlier films.  Giantess Julie Strain is back to crush acting.  And long-time series regular Rodrigo Obregon gets many a chuckle with his awkward suave.  But I’m really not digging the whole Texas thing.  Line dancing?!  What the hell, Texas.  (Look out for Andy Sidaris acting up a storm in that post-murder locker room).

Day of the Warrior:  Julie Strain has switched names and sides, playing some kind of laughably heroic leader type for our super-spy team.  Most of the regular faces are gone, except perennial favorite Rodrigo Obregon (with sweet sideburns!).  The pro-wrestler villain, Warrior looks like he stepped out of George Michael’s Fantasy Land.  But this movie, in spite of its Texas local, manages to bring back a lot of the charm of earlier films in the series.  Oh, sure, there’s still not a real boob in sight (being the late 90s, the women are starting to sport tattoos, too --ew!), and people seem dodgy on the whole ‘acting’ thing.  But it’s occasionally funny, always goofy, and several things blow up.  Watching a dumbass stripper run across a lawn in high heals while trying to hold onto an oversized video tape is comedy gold.  I’m also impressed that a series of movies with this much pseudo-sex is as monumentally un-erotic as it is.  You’d think something sexy would just happen statistically.  Nope.  But that’s just part of the charm.

Return to Savage Beach:  “You want to go for that swim?“ Oh, yeah.  Back to Hawaii!  At least for part of it.  The final film in the modern epic of spies, explosions, and breast implants features a lot of familiar faces.  Rodrigo Obergon is wearing a sweet Phantom of the Opera mask, too.  Awesome.  This movie also has more Fu.  I think every movie could be made better with some Fu.  And when the two ladies show up in Tomb Raider outfits, with their comicbookishly oversized chests, I was laughing pretty hard.  Look, it’s awful.  I know.  But it’s wonderful.  A great ending to a wacky series.

Night of the Living Dead:  The movie that pretty much launched a sub-genre and redefined the walking dead, this movie is a tight thriller about a bunch of random people stuck in a house, surrounded by an army of hungry dead.  Like the best of what has become known as ‘zombie’ movies (they’re actually referred to as ghouls here), this is about people, not monsters.  The walking dead are like a natural disaster, with the added horror of familiarity and the potential of any one of us to join their ranks with little warning.  Grim, dark, and well ahead of its time.  A must see for horror fans.

    I also got in a few episodes of Supercar, which is weird and fun.  Love those puppets.  Then a few episodes of Futurama, which continues to make me smile.  I love the combination of cerebral and low-brow.  Ben and I also watched another episode of From the Earth to the Moon.  Great show, but every time I watch an episode, I feel a deep emptiness and disappointment that we betrayed all those people did by letting our imagination die.  It’s time to get back to exploring beautiful places.

    And I got my hands on the first two disks of Torchwood’s fourth season, Miracle Day.  Dang, but it’s tough.  Season three, Children of Earth was an emotionally brutalizing experience, but mercifully short.  This season is considerably longer, but no less brutal.  Don’t like anyone too much.  Six episodes in and one of my favorite characters is not coming back.  After the first two seasons, which were uneven to say the very least, season’s three and four have been fascinating, if sometimes hard to watch TV.  Holy nuts is Bill Pullman creepy.

    Finally, I read the second hardcover volume of B.P.R.D.  You can read my review here.  And I finished listening to the audio book of Christopher Hitchens’ Arguably.  See my review here.

-Matt

Brad's Week In Dork! (4/1-4/7)

Finished The Wire!!!  Soooooooooo Good!  But somehow it didn't consume my entire week.  I knocked it out quick and moved onto a rather massive collection of movies and comic books.  The only film I caught in the theater was Wrath of the Titans and I definitely enjoyed it more than the rest of America.  But I guess the big event this week was the downloading of Amazon's Instant Video app onto my Playstation 3.  Something I once swore I would never do, but I fell to temptation when Morgan Spurlock's Comic Con doc premiered via streaming and once I stepped through the Looking Glass I had to see Ben Wheatley's Kill List.  I don't think I'll make a regular habit of this, I want to see my films first on the big screen when I can, but if there is no other option in the DC Market than I'll fork over 6.99 for the streaming option.  It's a brave new world and I realize that it's the death of ownable media, but you can't fight progress and blah, blah, blah.  

TV OF THE WEEK!

The Wire Season 5:  It might have taken me all of last week to get through Season 4, but I whipped through the final season of The Wire in just two sittings.  8 Hours on Sunday, 2 on Monday.  Bam.  Done.  And I already miss it.  Obviously, I'm way late to the party on this show and I'm sure David Simon would reject my too-little-too-late adoration (Read His Disgust Here), but I'm now here to declare The Wire as one of my all time favorite shows.  And I wasn't so sure about the Newspaper angle at the start of season 5 or McNulty's insane serial killer scheme, but by the midway point I was hooked.  And the confrontation between McNulty & Scott at the station made it all worth it.  Honestly, I was surprised at how Not Depressing the conclusion of the show was--sure, there were plenty of bodies to be buried but not as many as I was expecting.  I would love to live in a world where there was at least one or two more seasons of The Wire to consume, but I thought 5 was a fine conclusion for this cast of characters.  Omar, McNulty, Bubbles, Bunny, and Daniels all had satisfying climaxes, as did the kids from Season 4.  Really glad to see Namond and Prezbo one last time as well.  If by some miracle I'm not the last man on Earth to have seen this show, I encourage you stragglers to jump on this bandwagon.  There has never been a better cop show; I'm willing to stake my reputation on it.

Justified "Coalition":  What the hell!?!?  How could Boyd Crowder leave the guarding of Quarels to a couple of prostitutes and just one goon?!?!  Did he seriously think that this mafia beast man wouldn't take this trilogy of dopes out?  I guess Boyd hasn't had much interaction with Quarels and maybe he just didn't quite understand the savagery of his captive, but it still felt like some tremendously convenient scripting.  That being said, once I got over my fanboy indignation regarding this character flub, I found the build to next week's finale appropriately intense with Limehouse puppet mastering the pawns of Harlan County.  Raylan and Dickie have another showdown, and Trooper Tom...yeash.

Bored To Death Season 1:  After much prodding from Matthew, I finally broke down and watched HBO's half hour comedy.  It was solid.  Don't know if I liked it as much as him, or my wife for that matter, but there's a definite charm to Jason Schwartzman's wino wannabe private dick.  I was kinda hoping for more Noir-ish sendup, but it's more hipstery woe-is-me silly.  Ted Danson is probably my favorite aspect of the show.  His pothead publisher feels like an even more exaggerated version of his Curb Your Enthusiasm character and his cold sore was E-P-I-C.  Thankfully, Zach Galifanakis is not the obnoxious blob that he is in the Hangover films and I kinda adored his relationship with his sperm hoarding girlfriend.  Matt assures me that the second season is even better and I am curious to see what kind of bonkers Schwartzman & Co get into next.

Supernatural "Out With The Old":  Season 7 has been all over the map.  After several stand alone episodes (most of them fun), the boys encounter the Leviathan threat once more.  But not in any major plot development kinda way, just a couple of munchers running rogue from the pack.  There's a great opening sequence involving killer ballet shoes and watching Dean resist the temptation to dance was hilarious, but the rest of the ep was a big meh.  Time to move this story forward.

Supernatural "The Born-Again Identity":  Everyone's favorite angel returns to the series!  Unfortunately so does my least favorite demon, Meg.  Ugh.  That woman just annoys the hell outta me.  And this is yet another episode that deals with (and hopefully wraps up) Sam's latest bit of crazy brain.  I'd like to see the three guys kicking ass and taking names again, but it feels like Cas has been forever regulated to the background.  Bummer.

MOVIES OF THE WEEK!

Take A Hard Ride:  "A Wanted Man, That's All That Matters." The spiritual sequel to the blaxploitation Super Group flick Three The Hard Way, this Spaghetti Western reteams genre titans Jim Brown, Fred Williamson, and Jim Kelly against bounty hunter Lee Van Cleef and his army of banditos. The fun resides in the bitter back & forth between man-of-his-word Brown and snake gambler Williamson. Kelly is solid as the half-breed mute with incredible but mysterious Kung Fu skills and Van Cleef is typically reliable, but we're here for the football icons. And the Spaghetti Western sub-genre offers plenty of violent twists and unexpected downbeats.  As usual, check out the rest of my thoughts for this week's Western Review at cineAWESOME!

Wrath of the Titans:  Free from the confines of the original film's remake, Wrath of the Titans is an enjoyable bit of CGI mythological Tom Foolery. Sam Worthington will never be my go-to action hero soldier, but with his hair grown out and the stench of Avatar fading, he's a Perseus I'm comfortable riding Pegasus. If I was 10 years old I'd be gaga for Wrath with its parade of classic beasties (The Minotaur! The Cyclops! Cronus!) and the Hades/Zeus smackdown teamup.  Sure it's probably gonna fade from memory rather quickly but it's fun enough while running.  And The Real Rocknrolla's Toby Kebbell is kinda hilarious with his useless demigod and surprisingly effective pep talks.

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy:  A celebration of Cold War espionage and World War nostalgia, director Tomas Alfredson crafts a stylish, devil-in-the-details puzzle thriller that's nearly as cool as its cast. Gary Oldman's top notch spy is a quiet badass in which the film's most exciting action sequences seem to occur behind his thick-rimmed glasses. And he's surrounded by Britain's finest with Tom Hardy, Colin Firth, John Hurt, and Benedict Cumberbatch all delivering the goods. Not the kind of film to just leave on while you iron shirts, it requires your full attention but the invested will be rewarded.

Pusher:  Nicolas Winding Refn's directorial debut is a grungy little monster of a film following two low rent dealers (Kim Bodnia & Mads Mikkelsen) as they naturally self-destruct amongst the real drug lord professionals. The film definitely thumps along to its own rhythm and it takes on a pretty horrific glow, but it failed to capture my full attention.  Not surprisingly, Mikkelsen steals the show with his few scenes and I do look forward to him taking center stage in the later parts of the trilogy.  Still, it's telling that I didn't immediately pop in the next installment after the credits rolled.

The Wild Angels:  "We wanna be free to ride our machines without being hassled by The Man!...And We Wanna Get Loaded!" Peter Fonda & Bruce Dern are Blues & The Loser, the two big toughs that run the San Pedro chapter of the Hell's Angels and they spend their days finding new ways to hassle cops and play their bongos. Roger Corman continues his youth-gone-mad formula battling conformity just cuz; whether its Rock n Roll High Schoolers or swastika fetishizing bikers. Still, I couldn't help but side with Dick Miller's Anzio vet who chides Fonda for wearing the Iron Cross or Frank Maxwell's disgusted, morally(and physically)-assaulted preacher when dealing with these inconsistent psychotics. Yeah, you wanna be free and get loaded but you also don't have qualms with raping Diane Ladd.  This isn't just about rockin' around the clock.

The Beast With 1,000,000 Eyes:  It's got a great title and a really cool poster, but that's about it. Roger Corman has produced hundreds of movies and they're not all going to be winners. Paul Birch and Lorna Thayer run around avoiding twinkling lights while birds, dogs, and milk cows run amuck. But they've got love and they've got a shotgun so it's all gonna be okay.  But it won't be Not Boring...

Machine Gun Kelly:  "When Rabbits Roar It's A Bad Time." A rather young and mustacheless Charles Bronson stars as real-life villain Machine Gun Kelly in this Roger Corman cheapie. Pushed around by his moll, Kelly plays it tough with his Tommy Gun.  But when a kidnapping scheme turns sour and an intense fear of death haunts his nightmares, the big bad discerns the futility of his crimes and the death chair seems imminent. Bronson and Susan Cabot are excellent together as their bickering escalates, and the remaining crippled goons are solid supporters.  Not my favorite Corman gangster picture, this still would make an excellent companion to St Valentine's Day Massacre.

Comic Con Episode IV A Fan's Hope:  Don't expect much depth from Morgan Spurlock's latest documentary, more than anything else, it plays simply as a big commercial for Comic Con. That being said, as a recent attendee, this gets me incredibly pumped for this year's trip to Dork Mecca. Hall H Celebrities! Exclusive Action Figures! The Masquerade! Stan Lee! Nerds! Nerds! Nerds! Those not in the know will not find understanding here, but for the rest of us lucky dorks, A Fan's Hope provides a nice photo album experience.

Miss Bala:  This is a pretty fantastic bit of brutal chaos in which wannabe beauty queen Stephanie Sigman visits the wrong Tijuana Night Club on the wrong night before competition and witnesses a gangland massacre. But that's just the beginning of her troubles. What works so well about this film is Sigman's (and the audiences) utter confusion surrounding the criminal acts. There's something going on about DEA Agents and a rival gang, but all you can be concerned with is how much hell these outside forces are going to put Sigman and her family through. She wanders in and out of gun battles, news reports, police departments, and she has no control as to where this violence is going to dump her. Scary and thrilling atypical action picture.

Kill List:  "I used to love looking at fires when I was a kid." The less known about this film the better. Don't watch the trailer, don't read reviews. Just see the movie. Kill List begins with some pretty epic domestic squabling and slowly pulls you into a terrifying realm of violence. Parts reminded me of Norwegian comic book artist Jason's I Killed Adolf Hitler (but I see that book everywhere I turn these days) and other bits were straight outta The Wicker Man. It's a beast of a flick with bursting gore not for the timid.  Kill List is easily one of the year's best mood pieces and one of my favorite films of the year so far.  But I might have already said too much.

COMICS OF THE WEEK!

Ragemoor #1:  As much as I've loved Richard Corben's Hellboy minis of late, it's great to see him tackling something original.  And Ragemoor seems to be the perfect fit for the artist and a solid companion to his House on the Borderland adaptation.  Who doesn't love an evil castle fueled on pagan blood?  Especially one that consumes long lost relatives who dare to scoff its monstrous intent?  Hard to tell who or what the focus of this series is going to be, but I'm game.

Fatale #4:  Reading this month to month is proving difficult.  With a plot that follows several characters over different decades, there is a lot to juggle between issues.  However, when you read them back to back Fatale is shaping up to be one of the best genre mashups in recent years.  Four issues into this proposed 15 issue Lovecraft Noir epic, the horror of the saga begins to solidify.  And I can't think of another comic out there I look more forward to each month...until Hellboy in Hell hits the racks.

Winter Soldier #3:  Is it me, or does Ed Brubaker's Winter Soldier feel a lot like Brian Michael Bendis early on in New Avengers?  Brubaker's grabbing Doom Bots and jet pack machine gun apes and whatever else he can find under Marvel's rock and forcing the odd onto Bucky & Black Widow.  Maybe there's a little Grant Morrison in there too.  It's seriously fun, but maybe more fanciful than I would like...or, maybe I'm just still bitter about Steve Rodgers' return to Cap.

Jason Conquers America:  Don't bother with this one shot unless you are a die hard Jason fan.  A sampling of his oddball cartoons separated out between a couple of brief interviews.  Nothing here matches the power of his graphic novels but fanboys will get a chuckle outta God's leaf pile and the Grim Reaper's balloon.

--Brad