Comic Review: American Barbarian

“I’m heading out to kick some more ass, but I need an army...Anybody want to come with me?”

    If you enjoy the wilder side of comics, you have to look to Tom Scioli.  Clearly an artistic descendant of Jack Kirby, Scioli’s storytelling is balls-out crazy. I first came across his work on Godland, a wild take on The Fantastic Four.  But after meeting him at a convention, I had to read The Myth of 8-Opus, which was marvelously weird.  And then...And then he took on Transformers VS G.I. Joe.  Holy Mother of Crap. I’ve been sitting on American Barbarian for a while, now.  But this week, it was time.

“I’ve got God’s balls right here!”

    Like some kind of 70s, Saturday morning cartoon, jacked up on some hard drugs, and pumped up with unchained comic book imagination, American Barbarian tells an odd tale. The red, white, and blue haired warriors who have traditionally defended a good kingdom have produced an ultimate incarnation.  When a giant, evil, Egyptian Pharaoh with tanks for feet roars across the world, only one man can stand in his way.  Well, one man and a bunch of other weirdos he recruits for the efforts.

“R-E-V-E-N-G-E-!-!-!”

    It kept reminding me of weird stuff like the Thundarr The Barbarian cartoon and Killraven comics.  But with Scioli’s particular brand of over the top weirdness. It’s a refreshing bit of fun that absolutely revels in the comic book medium, blazing with colorful splash pages and likes of insane dialog.  A must read.

-Matthew J. Constantine

Comic Review: Transformers VS G.I. Joe

    Full disclosure, here.  As a wee lad, G.I. Joe, was my jam.  I had the toys, I watched the cartoon, I listened to the audio-stories, I had the bed sheets; you name it.  It was even the book that I delved into during my first, short-lived attempt at following comics.  My fandom did not continue into adulthood, but I have fond memories, none the less.  However, I never thought too much of Transformers.  I watched the cartoon, and I guess I enjoyed it (more than Voltron or He-Man and some of the others popular at the time).  But I wasn’t in to the toys, I never contemplated putting an Autobots sticker on my car, and I flippin’ hate the new movies (I kinda like the second live-action G.I. Joe film).  I won’t swear to it, but I think the only Transformers thing I ever read was a G.I. Joe VS Transformers comic set during World War II, from the early 2000s.  I liked it, but it didn’t make me seek out more.

    So, I had little interest in another crossover between these franchises.  But, I’m a big fan of Tom Scioli and his mad bastard Jack Kirby-like insanity.  When I heard he was working on the project, I knew I’d have to give it a look, even if it otherwise didn’t interest me.  Scioli’s that good.  Free Comic Book Day came along, and there was a preview issue.  I took it home and may have even read it that night.  Holy crap!  Reading it was like plucking childhood memories right out of my head.  It had the weird little kid logic I used to employ when playing.  The same vaguely sick sense of wonder and horror that produced things like building huge structures, peppered with action figures, then knocking them down to see how all the bodies end up.  The dialog, the plotline, the crazy ideas; Scioli and co-author John Barber are tapped into something.  This is everything my weird little brain would have wanted the cartoon to be, everything it was when I was alone.

    You can’t talk about a Scioli project and not talk about the art.  With hyper-weird images sifted through Golden Age comic mentality, his work explodes with energy.  And with his odd, slightly off, almost muted colors, reading the book sometimes feels like reading the backs of packages, or those full page ads you’d find in comic books from the 80s.  Scioli’s work calls out for color, and it gets a ton here.

    If you were a kid in the 80s, if you played with G.I. Joes or Transformers, if you’re in to weird comics, and if you like the idea of something way, way out there being dressed in a mainstream, commercial skin, read Transformers VS G.I. Joe.  It’s the kind of thing I love, the kind of book I sit back and wonder, ‘how the hell did this get greenlit?’

Transformers VS G.I. Joe
Authors: Tom Scioli & John Barber
Artist: Tom Scioli
Publisher: IDW
ISBN: 978-1-63140-190-9

-Matthew J. Constantine

Matt’s Week in Dork! (9/7/14-9/13/14)

    This past week I spent much of my time at Rehoboth, Delaware, a beach resort town right up against the Atlantic Ocean.  My goodness, it was swell.  We hit just after the end of the Summer season, as much of the community was winding down, so we had the place largely to ourselves.  This meant that some businesses and activities were closed (no mini-golf that we could find), but much of the vacation madness and crowding was over.  That’s more my cup of tea anyway, being somewhat averse to large crowds as a general thing.  Consequently, there’s not a lot in the way of movies for this week, but plenty of other cool stuff.

    On the journey up, I read the first volume of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, this month’s graphic novel club book.  It was one of the first comics I read when I started getting into the medium about 12 years ago, and this was my first re-reading of it.  I enjoyed the heck out of Alan Moore’s referential smorgasbord of Victorian literature.

    We arrived in Ocean City, where we hailed the first cab to come along…the craziest, most 70s, adventure cab you could ever want.  Despite having a Huey Lewis and the News cassette (along with the Big Chill soundtrack!), it was not, as we were briefly worried, a murder van.  It did have a sweet surfboard on top and a rubber skeleton hanging out the back window.  Bam!  In that character filled van, with a character of a driver, we crossed the length of Ocean City to catch another bus, the Dart, which took us out to our lodgings.  Sadly, the public transit in the Ocean City-Rehoboth corridor is not the most user friendly, with very little helpful info on their website, and no ability to track bus progress.  And when you’re talking about bus routes that can be as much as an hour and a half, easier tracking would be very helpful.  Still, in Rehoboth itself, the buses seemed pretty frequent, even in this off season.  The buses were nice (and clean), but their website could use some work.

    When we hopped off the bus, we were greeted by a cute little farmer’s market, called Fifer’s.  The folks running it were very friendly, and the food we snagged was quite good.  I’d recommend the apple cider donuts, and their tubs of snacks (dried fruit, trail mix, etc.) were quite good.  The chocolate covered pretzels even used real chocolate, not that waxy crap you get in most grocery stores.  Oh, man….

    Though the weather was a bit drizzly, we took the short walk to the beach after getting settled in, and it was simply beautiful.  I’ve been to precious few beaches in my day, and most of them were on the frigid and rocky shores of Maine.  This was a classic resort town beach.  Stretching off into the misty fog  at the far end of either direction, the sand gently sloped down to the rolling waves, giving plenty of room for people to set up and enjoy.  However, due to the lateness of our visit and the wet weather, the beach was mostly deserted.  Perfect.

    After the peaceful view of the rolling ocean, we headed to Rehoboth proper, where there’s an awesome, old-timey boardwalk that looks like what Atlantic City would look like without the sleaze.  I was reminded of the Bangor State Fare mixed with the usual tourist trap shops.  But it was all pleasant and fun to walk around.  But first up was The Frogg Pond, which we had heard had the best wings in town.  I don’t know if there are better, but they were sure as heck delicious.  I was only disappointed that I wasn’t hungry enough to eat another round.  The general atmosphere was of a typical sports bar, but it was pleasant and clean, and the staff was friendly.  There was some live music of moderate quality and perhaps a touch too much volume, but nothing offensive or too off-putting.  After our meal, we stopped by a Candy Kitchen, a shop more common in the region than Starbucks in New York City to purchase some extra snacks and sweets.  Again, I was reminded of the difference real chocolate makes.  You know it’s good when it starts melting on contact with your skin.  Wowzer.  Good stuff.

    Tuesday morning, we had breakfast at The Sunrise Restaurant, a highly rated local favorite.  I have to admit, I found it a bit underwhelming.  The portions were enormous, but the food was sort of middling.  It had that awesome local diner type vibe, but I can’t really rave about it.

    After a trip to local outlet stores (I needed a new pair of sneakers) we walked back into Rehoboth and had a drink at The Summer House.  I drank The Painkiller, which did it’s job.  It was on these walks through town that we discovered the whole place seems to be ruled by a benevolent dictator, Jack Lingo.  His signs are everywhere, and he seems to be the name behind nearly ever real estate deal going.  His office complex is quite impressive, and looks like a historic monument.  We never met or saw the man, and that’s too bad.  I would love to have a face to put with the name.  I’m sure it’s handsome, well quaffed, and accompanied by a rich, smooth voice.  After passing the massive palace of the Mighty Lingo, it was on to the boardwalk where we ate some fries at Thrasher’s, which were quite good.  And we made our first stop at The Ice Cream Store with its dizzying array of flavors.  If we’d stayed another week, I would not have grown tired of trying ice creams and if there were more hours in the day, we’d have likely been hitting the place up a couple times each one we spent in town.  Another walk on the beach brought us home, where we quickly turned around and headed down to the water, putting our feet in for the first time.  While it was a bit cloudy and windy, the water was amazing.  And standing there with the surf breaking around us was pretty darned spectacular.  It was what I’d always wanted the beach to be, not the shiver inducing, dirty green harshness of Sand Beach.

    Later that evening we walked back into town to have dinner at Dogfish Head Brewpub.  My lady was very pleased with the selection of beers, being so near the actual brewery.  (Heck, even I enjoyed sips of a few of those beers, and I normally can’t stand the stuff).  Their burger special was excellent and easy on the wallet.  And the service was exceptional.  I think this may have been my favorite eating experience of the week (a week full of good eating).  It would appear that there is a Dogfish Head close to me, and I definitely plan on visiting sooner rather than later.

    Early Wednesday morning, we walked down to the beach to watch the sunrise.  While the clouds didn’t cooperate as much as we might have hoped, it was still quite lovely.  After that, we grabbed some breakfast sandwiches from Fifers and settled in for a relaxing day.  We were feeling kind of lazy, so we spent much of the early day lounging and watching a couple movies.  Each of us brought along a few the other hadn’t seen, just in case we were stuck inside.  So, I’ve now seen Dirty Dancing, and she’s now seen Buckaroo Banzai.  Ain’t love grand?!

Dirty Dancing:  Apparently set in the early 1960s, this extremely 80s film is filled with everything you expect.  Dancing (sometimes dirty), cheesy dialog (“Last month I was eating Jujubes just to keep alive!”), and hacksaw editing.  Oh, and surprise After School Special/“very special episode of Blossom” B storyline.  Jerry Orbach is particularly awesome as the greatest dad ever.  Plus, like all good 80s films it ends in a dance/concert/big game.

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the Eighth Dimension:  One of the most madcap, off the wall, weirdly involved, sprawling, never explains who the deuce these people are movies you’ll ever see.  It hits the ground running and it runs all over the danged place.  A bunch of hard rocking scientists/crime-fighters/doctors led by Peter Weller face off against criminal aliens in the form of the best 80s movie villain actors, John Lithgow, Christopher Lloyd, Dan Hedaya, and Vincent Schiavelli (yes, not ONE, but all FOUR!).  The movie feels like what a good comic book movie should be.  There’s little in the way of origin story, and lots in the way of implied history between various characters.  It feels like you’ve been thrust into their world and you’ve got to figure out what’s happening and why.  Infinitely quotable, funny, weird, and often outright bugnuts.  It’s kind of amazing.

    Wednesday afternoon we had the best weather of the whole week, so we went down to the ocean again, enjoying the heck out of the surf, getting pretty well soaked, and even laying out for a while in the sun to dry off.  There were so many people with dogs, too, which were having a great time.  The vibe of the beach was really chill all week, and while never crowded, everyone seemed to be into the water.

    Wednesday night, we walked to Bramble & Brine, a classier place than I’m used to, but quite nice.  It had a slightly hoity-toity, very family-owned feel to it, while not being too stuffy.  The food was excellent.  Not cheap by any stretch.  But excellent.  Both of us were blown away by the lamb porterhouse, which was just an appetizer, but was darned good.  Darned good.  And they had a bunch of Prohibition era cocktails, which you know I’m into.  The service was exceptional, friendly and attentive, without hovering.  On the way back, we hit up The Ice Cream Store again, and Gidget's Gadgets, a kind of nicknack and kitsch shop.

    Thursday morning began the clean-up and return trip prep work.  With another round of breakfast sandwiches from Fifers, we set about tidying up.  By around noon, we were out the door and heading for the bus pick-up.  Once back to Ocean City, with suggestions from a friend, Rebecca directed us toward Ocean City Taphouse.  Good burgers and good homemade chips (with Old Bay).  From there it was back on the bus with a few stops, transfers, etc. and back home.  On the return trip, I read the second volume of The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, which I enjoyed even more than the first.  I’m pretty sure I’ll be rereading Black Dossier and Century in the coming weeks.

    This was, without a doubt, the best danged vacation I’ve ever taken.  And I’d recommend Rehoboth to anyone looking for a fun, relaxing time by the beach.  I’m sure it is crazy during the peak season, and maybe not as much fun for introverts like myself.  But generally, it was pretty amazing.  The people were wonderful and the food fantastic.  Getting home, I understandably fell into a post-vacation funk.  Still, it was a great week. And I sure as heck want to give a big thank you to the owners of the place we stayed at.  You can check out the listing here: http://www.vrbo.com/513559.  Excellent location, wonderful and friendly owner, and spacious enough for a larger group, if you're interested (one group that stayed there before us was a bachelorette party/week).  I can't say enough good things.

Muppets Most Wanted:  After hearing some pretty bad press about this film, I found myself enjoying the heck out of it.  Plenty of the usual Muppets antics, lots of blink and you’ll miss ‘em cameos, and some fun musical numbers.  While it’s not going to change the world, it’s a very fun movie, and lots of fun for the family.  If you like the Muppets, you should find plenty to like here.

    Saturday, Brad and I headed out to SPX.  I feel more and more each year that I’ve lost the thread (if I ever had it) of the whole SPX thing.  I enjoy going, but I’m usually done with the place relatively quickly, and a bit relieved when I leave.  As the years have gone by, I’ve found the Baltimore Comic Con has become more diverse, more interesting, both in content and in attendees, while SPX has become more homogenous.  Table after table of similar, often not especially impressive work.  And the crowd seems to have all gone to the same clothing shop and the same stylist.  Purple or blue or pink flannel shirts, skinny jeans, thick-rimmed glasses, Converse sneakers, and haircuts that looked a heck of a lot like Pete White’s from Venture Bros., all mixed into a kind of ugly, utilitarian androgyny.  And almost everyone in attendance was white.  Jim Rugg and Tom Scioli were there, and I was glad to get some stuff from them.  But overall, it didn’t get me too awful pumped, as it has in years past.

The Phantom:  This serial is a bit longer than I was expecting.  15 chapters, instead of the 12 I’m more used to.  It’s better than some, but not among my favorites.  It features the usual ‘Mysterious Lands’ that are some vague hodgepodge of Africa, South America, the American West, and tropical islands of the Hollywood cliché factory.  Tom Tyler, who I enjoyed so much as Captain Marvel in The Adventures of Captain Marvel, one of my favorite movie serials ever, is super dull in this.  His lifeless performance as the Phantom is one of the weaker elements, which is rough when he’s the main character.  Good but not great.

Blood Money (aka: The Stranger and the Gunfighter):  It’s not just East Meets West.  It’s East Meets West with spaghetti sauce.  Unfortunately, as with several of these attempts at genre mashing, the end result is a diluted, half-way version of both, not a good synthesis of both.  Lee Van Cleef is pretty much phoning it in, and Lieh Lo lacks the charm to make up for it.  It’s not terrible, and less dull than a good number of forgettable Spaghetti Westerns, but don’t go out of your way.

    And that was that.  A fine week, with plenty of good food, good fun, comics, movies, and more.  Who’d have thought an after season beach in Delaware would be so darned nice?

-Matthew J. Constantine

Matt’s Week in Dork! (5/4/14-5/10/14)

    I started off the week by reading some of the comics from Free Comic Book Day.  First up was Guardians of the Galaxy, which is pretty much just an introduction to the characters for anyone who isn’t familiar.  OK.  Fine.  There are also short intros for a Thanos story and a Spider-Man story.  Thanos certainly interests me; Spider-Man, not so much.  The free issue of Transformers VS. G.I. Joe by Tom Scioli.  Awesomely wacky.  It takes all the weird silliness of the cartoons, then dials it back to a sort of Silver Age crazy.  I love the weird tech, the nutty action.  It’s a blast.  Not a bad way to start the week.  As you’ll see, this week I had a lot more time for watching movies than I’ve had most of the time recently.

The Legend of Hercules:  I really do like that there have been a bunch of Greek myth based films of late.  But, when you get a bunch, you’re gonna get some dogs, and this is one.  That said, it’s better than Pompeii or 300: Rise of an Empire.  Kallen Lutz is a beefy drone, the pseudo-300 style slow-mo action, and the generally bland story does nothing to make the film work.  It’s also not super exciting.  Still, not as bad as I expected.  That said, the fact that he doesn’t kill the female gladiator seemed extremely condescending.  She fights in the arena, she’s worthy of a fighter’s death.

The Sheriff and the Satellite Kid:  Oh, man, this is terrible.  I didn’t know it was Italian before I started.  If the idea of an Italian family film about a sheriff from the American South and an alien child fills you with existential terror, don’t worry.  It means you’re still sane.  Everything you’re thinking.  It’s that, plus crap.

Vampyr:  Wonderfully weird and experimental, this early vampire film is dripping with atmosphere.  It’s also fascinating to see a very, very early talkie, where it’s shot and feels like a silent film, but has occasional bits of dialog spoken.  The lead actor would have made a great H.P. Lovecraft, too.  One to see for fans of horror and fans of early film.

Wandering Ginza Butterfly:  There isn’t anything wrong with this film, I guess.  I simply never cared about it.  Crime and ugliness in Japan.  Tough people doing rough business.  But, meh.

Die Fabre:  An excellent adaptation of H.P. Lovecraft’s awesome story The Color Out of Space, this German film does a good job of modifying location and time, without loosing any of the important aspects of the story.  It’s very low budget, but it’s well made.  I love the way the story builds and the way various times weave together.  And boy, a bunch of the stuff during the climax is unsettling.  Well worth seeking out.  These independent films seem to be the way to go with Lovecraft.  No unnecessary love interest addition, and a willingness to stick with the concepts.

    Monday night, and it was off to the Alamo to join the NOVA Roller Derby folks for a fund raiser, and a fun movie.  I won a Robocop (remake) poster.  So, you know that’s going up on the wall (if by ‘wall’ I mean in a tube to be given away as a gag gift at some point).  B-Movie Bingo was a lot of fun, and the whole night had a very up-beat, party atmosphere.  A great night out.

Unholy Rollers:  Some good old fashioned sleaze.  An unlikable sociopath inexplicably becomes the star of a roller derby team, and mayhem follows.  Boobs, skates, and a fat lady with a whip.  Bad hair, colorful outfits, and the editing skills of a young Marty Scorsese.  Actually, some of the skating footage, whatever else you might have to say about the film, is quite good.  And the whole thing is a blast to watch.  Nutty, but a blast.

Jodorowsky’s Dune:  Alejandro Jodorowsky is, for lack of a better word, insane.  And it’s kind of wonderful.  This is the chronicle of the time he maybe almost sort of made a film version of Dune.  Had it happened, he would have beat Star Wars to the punch, and maybe, just maybe, changed the way science fiction film was made…Or not.  While it’s a wonderful vision of what might have been, I tend to think the reality would have been less thrilling than the possibility.  Although, that said, if someone were to use his amazing book of storyboards and combine them with modern technologies…well, I don’t know that the result would be like LSD without dropping LSD, but it’d sure be interesting to see.  And while that ‘what might have been’ possibility is haunting, what did happen because of Dune’s failure was pretty amazing.  I keep comforting myself by repeating that had Dune come together, there would have been no Alien.  And on a completely personal note, there would have been no Metabarons, which was one of the key books to get me into comics, so I might have never done so.  This documentary is very entertaining, and filled with odd cats.  There’s plenty of samples of the weirdness that might have been, and the later films that drew upon it (Star Wars, Flash Gordon, etc.).  A must see for fans of the weird, for fans of science fiction, and for those interested in the ‘what ifs?’ of film.

Lemora: A Child’s Tale of The Supernatural:  Boring and awkward.  What a great combination.  There are a few cool bits in this middle of the road, typical low budget 70s Satanist/Vampire film.  Unfortunately, they don’t nearly make up for the dull script and bland acting.  This is what The Devil’s Rain should, by right, be (as opposed to the entertaining movie it is).  But this film doesn’t have the shockingly good production design and cinematography that elevate it beyond its worth.  You can skip Lemora.  You’ve seen it a dozen times before in better films.

Islam: Empire of Faith:  For an introduction and very surface overview of Islam and its history, this isn’t bad.  It’s perhaps, a bit too gentle, a bit too glossy.  But a lot of these documentaries, particularly those that deal extensively with currently active religions, tend to be a little more forgiving than perhaps they should be.  It also perpetuates a duality that feels like a hold-over of Victorian history, the East Vs. West debate.  The idea that Islam evolved separately from Western culture is simply wrong.  It is another part of Western culture, coming out of the same region as Judaism and Christianity, steeped in the learning of the Greeks.  None of these things happened in a vacuum.  This documentary didn’t get me as fired up about reading more, perhaps because it glossed over a lot of stuff I’ve already read a good deal about(?).  But if you’re unfamiliar with the history of Islam, this is probably a good primer.

Monsters:  This is what Kaiju films can be.  The monsters are an oppressive force that hovers over the lives of the main characters.  The world is haunted what has happened, shell shocked by the trauma of violence and horror beyond common reckoning.  It also shows the infinite ability of humans to get used to things.  I hope the director’s new film, the second attempt at doing Godzilla in the States, is as good.

A Knight’s Tale:  I thought I was the protector of Italian virginity.  Ah, well.  I do respect filmmakers for picking a style or an idea and going for it.  In the case of this movie, they do go for it.  A rock & roll, medieval comedy.  All right.  Sure.  A good cast and some funny bits.  Unfortunately, the story is frightfully uninspired, with every plot beat exactly where it is expected.  It’s cute, and light hearted, and that’s OK.  I just wish it was a bit less paint by number.

Godzilla VS the Sea Monster (aka Ebirah-Horror of the Deep):  A bunch of weirdoes come across some evil doers and a giant lobster monster.  What to do?  Obviously, try to wake up Mothra.  But will that be enough?  I enjoy the jungle island adventure stuff.  It feels like there were a few attempts at world building, though I don’t think Red Bamboo ever came back.  Not one of the best, but watchable and fun.

Rio Bravo:  “Thanks, Dude.”  Another of my Cinematic Resolutions for 2014, this classic Western has received a good deal of praise from folks, even from those who (like me) can’t stand John Wayne.  I’ll give him this, he does honestly seem to be making an attempt to act in this one.  He fails.  But he seems to be giving it a go, and that counts for something.  Otherwise, I do like the rest of the cast and the odd sort of siege story.

    Saturday afternoon, I finished up reading Asterios Polyp for the graphic novel club.  I enjoyed it, but didn’t love it.  Visually, it was very interesting, and there were some bits I liked a lot.  But there were things I didn’t like, too.

Godzilla VS the Smog Monster (aka Godzilla VS Hedorah):  “Save the Earth!!!”  One of the most pecceulier of the original films, it also features the what has to be one of the grossest of his foes, Hedorah.  Spawned from an alien seed, birthed in human pollution, this giant transforming blob of corruption is nasty and disgusting.  Pretty crazy stuff.  And the music is nuts.

Godzilla on Monster Island! (aka Godzilla VS Gigan):  “Are you people sure you’re all sane?!”  I love the crazy alien invasion.  I love the use of King Ghidorah and the introduction of Gigan.  And I really like the human investigators.  However, I don’t like the talking monsters.  Part of me would love to see the cosmic side of the Godzilla franchise opened up.  Several of the kaiju are not of Earthly origin.  Alien invasions aren’t uncommon.  What’s going on out there in space?

Dawn of the Dragon Slayer:  A perfectly OK medieval style fantasy film, this isn’t particularly good or interesting, but it’s serviceable, and in the realm of low budget schlock (SyFy, Asylum, etc.), that’s saying something.  There’s nothing about it that says, ‘rush right out and see me,’ but if it’s on, you could do worse.  If you’re really in a fantasy mood, and you don’t feel like watching Dragonslayer or Beastmaster again, this is OK.

Charleston Parade (aka Sur Un Air De Charleston):  This early science fiction short film by director Jean Renoir goes right for the discomfort zone by featuring an actor in blackface.  Oh, no.  I think there’s actually a not horrendous (?) message about civilization and exploitation at the heart of the movie… but the blackface.  Maybe I’m being too generous, and there is no message.  Or the message isn’t good.  I don’t know.  Again, the whole blackface thing pretty much throws me (and is even weirder, because it’s a black actor under the make-up).

    And that was it.  Another good week.

-Matt